生活大爆炸-S09E11_生活大爆炸

S01

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Guys tickets already went on sale What

-大伙们票已经开卖啦 -什么

They're not supposed to be available yet

不应该现在就开卖啊

I don't know what to tell you but they're on sale

我也不知道原因但就是开卖了

What Wait You're sure they're Star Wars tickets

等等你确定是新的《星球大战》电影票吗

No it's Steel Magnolias 2 Even Steelier

不是《钢木兰2: 钢上加钢》的票

《钢木兰》是1989年的女性友情电影

The Web site's frozen I can't get in

网页卡住了我上不了

Same here

我也是

Guys they're gonna sell out What are we gonna do

-这样下去票会卖光的 -我们该怎么办

All right this goes against everything I stand for

好吧虽然这违背我一直以来的信仰

but desperate times call for desperate measures

但走投无路也只能出此下策

Lord

主啊

This is Sheldon Cooper

我是谢尔顿·库珀

You're good friends with my mom

您跟我母亲是好朋友

I know I've spent my life denying that you exist

我知道我这辈子一直在否认您的存在

Got 'em And I will continue to do so

-买到了 -我还会继续否认下去

生

活

大

爆

炸

第九季第十一集

I'm really happy you and Amy are back together

你跟艾米和好如初我好高兴

今时今日

Oh thank you

谢谢

I'm also really happy but I can't pretend it's for you

我也很高兴但我假装不了是为你高兴

New Star Wars in three days

新星战电影三天后要上啦

Hey Thursday can't get here soon enough

鉴于周四还不能马上到来

I'm taking off work to watch the original trilogy

我要请假不上班在家看原作三部曲

while I eat enough Star Wars cereal to choke a Wookiee

还要一边吃[掐死]伍基人星战谷麦片

Uh sweetie you do realize Thursday is Amy's birthday

亲爱的你知道周四是艾米的生日吧

And you do realize I bought my ticket

那你也知道我买票的时候

when Amy and I were broken up

我跟艾米还没有复合呢

I hope you didn't need anything in that case

希望板子上没有你需要的东西了

'cause it's closed

因为已经拍板定案了

You guys just got back together

你们才刚刚复合

You might not want to ditch her on her birthday

她生日那天抛下她不太妙吧

I think Penny has a point You can see it another day

我觉得佩妮说得有道理你可以改天看嘛

But someone might spoil the movie

但别人可能会剧透啊

No one can spoil Amy's birthday for me

但艾米的生日别人就没办法剧透

Surprise She's even older

"惊喜她又老一岁了"

Who saw that coming

真是"万万没想到"啊

Oh that's nice

这话真"甜蜜"

Put that on her cake

写到她蛋糕上去吧

Oh great This again

这下好又来了

Arthur what brings you back

亚瑟什么风把你给吹来了

Uh beats me I I just

你把我问倒了我...

hope this isn't a a sex dream

只希望入的不是春梦

In the past you've come to me

过去你曾在我

when I'm struggling with a dilemma

碰到困境的时候来指点迷津

And and the one time where where you were afraid

还有一次是在你晚上害怕

and you needed me for for a night light

需要我来... 当夜灯

What's what's troubling you

什么事困扰到你了

My friends are telling me

我的小伙伴们跟我说

I shouldn't abandon my girlfriend on her birthday

我不应该在女朋友生日时抛下她

to see the new Star Wars movie

跑去看新的《星球大战》

Well sounds right

感觉说得没错啊

Can can I get out of this

我能脱下这身...

muumuu now

夏威夷妇女穆穆袍了吗

Those are the robes of the Jedi

这是绝地武士的袍子

the guardians of peace and justice in the galaxy

是银河系和平与正义的守护者呢

And they they they don't wear underwear

他们... 他们都不穿小内内

So you agree with my friends

所以你也同意他们的话

that I should skip the premiere

我不应该去看首映吗

Uh do do you love this girl

你爱那个女孩吗

Yes

爱

But she knows how important Star Wars is to me

但她知道《星球大战》对我有多重要

Well maybe you should show her how

或许你应该证明给她看看

how important she is to you

她在你心中到底多重要

By seeing the movie she'd want me to see

其方式是看她希望我看的电影吗

Sheldon you you can see this movie whenever you want

谢尔顿你有数不清的时间能看这电影

But you only have a limited number of days

但你能跟这女孩在一起的时间

that you you can be with this woman

却是有限的

Be with her

陪她吧

You're right

你说得对

Great

太好了

Where are you going

你要上哪去

I don't know

我不知道

but hopefully somewhere I can wear pants

但希望是一个我能穿裤子的地方

Sheldon what's wrong

谢尔顿怎么了

I wanted to let you know I'll be spending your birthday with you

我想让你知道我会陪你过生日

Okay

好的

See I I had tickets to the Star Wars premiere that night

本来那晚我有《星球大战》首映会的票

but Professor Proton came to me in a dream dressed as

可质子教授入我的梦身上还穿着

Obi Wan Kenobi and convinced me I should be with you

绝地武士欧比旺·肯诺比的衣服来劝我陪你

Obi what

欧比啥

I'll I'll let you get back to sleep now Good night

不打扰你了你先回去睡吧晚安

Okay Good night

好晚安

Wait Um Sheldon

等等谢尔顿

were you actually not gonna spend my birthday with me

本来我生日那天你是不打算陪我的吗

It's late Got to go Bye

时间晚了要睡了再见

Good for Sheldon deciding to stay with Amy on her birthday

谢尔顿决定陪艾米过生日这事得点个赞

I know

对啊

It's still gonna be weird to see the movie without him

去看电影时少了他还是会有点怪

Well we could wait a couple days and see it together

我们可以多等两天等他一起看啊

Hello

你们好啊

We're going to the comic book store You want to come

我们要去漫画书店你要一起吗

No I can't

去不了

I need to make preparations for Amy's birthday

我得为艾米的生日做准备

Which leads me to the following bit of business

因此我要先把这件事干了

This is my ticket to Star Wars

这是我《星球大战》的电影票

I don't have to tell you it is worth far more

不用我说你也知道这张票的价值

than its face value of $15 50

远远超过面额上的15.5美元

I trust you'll give it to someone worthy

我相信你会把它交给值得拥有的人

You got it

没问题

Well Penny might want to join us

佩妮可能会想跟我们一起去看

This is my ticket to Star Wars

这是我《星球大战》的电影票

Penny

佩妮

Penny

佩妮

Penny

佩妮

What happens if I say "Come in"

如果是我回"请进"会怎么样

Well find out

试试看呗

Come in

请进

Bernadette

伯纳黛特

Bernadette Bernadette

伯纳黛特伯纳黛特

Come in

请进

Keep it up

你俩就闹吧

I got nowhere else to be

反正我有的是时间

Just come in

快进来吧

For future reference if I want to watch Mean Girls

以后如果我想看《贱女孩》这部片

I'll stream it on Netflix

我会直接去网上看

We're sorry What do you need

抱歉啦你找我们干嘛

Well as you know

你们也知道

I'll be celebrating Amy's birthday with her

我会陪艾米一起庆祝生日

and I could use your assistance

我需要你们的协助

in helping me select the perfect gift

帮我挑出最完美的礼物

Sure

当然可以

Well so far I've come up with three ideas

目前为止我有三个想法

The first is a chance for her to play the harp

第一个是一个跟洛杉矶爱乐管弦乐团

with the L A Philharmonic

演奏竖琴的机会

Wow You can really arrange that

哇你真的能安排这事吗

Well I said a chance you know

机会嘛可能有也可能没有

When you tell them it's your birthday at Bennigan's

你跟连锁餐厅说今天是自己生日

they make a fuss

他们也会大开方便之门

I don't see why the Philharmonic would be any different

我觉得洛杉矶爱乐管弦乐团也会这样吧

How about something a little more realistic

不如来点实际的

Well Amy enjoys knitting her own sweaters

艾米喜欢自己织毛衣

so I was thinking of getting her an all expense paid trip

我在想自掏腰包赞助她去参加

to the Wisconsin Sheep and Wool Festival

威斯康辛州羊及羊毛节

Sorry I was waiting for the bazinga

抱歉我刚才在等你说"逗你玩"

Hold on It could be romantic

等等那也可以很浪漫啊

The two of them away together

他们俩一起远离尘嚣

keeping each other warm in snowy Wisconsin

在白雪皑皑的威斯康辛州相互取暖

No no no no She'd be going alone

不不不她自己去而已

Well if you think I'm afraid of birds

如果你们觉得我很怕鸟

you should see me around sheep

那真该看看我遇到羊会怎么样

Okay well what's the third option

好吧第三个选项是什么

That I have coitus with her

我跟她交媾

What do you think about giving Sheldon's ticket to Stuart

你们觉得把谢尔顿的票给斯尔图特怎么样

I don't know

不知道

Have you ever seen a movie with Stuart before

你们跟斯尔图特一起看过电影吗

It's like going with your grandpa

感觉就像跟自己爷爷去看电影

Instead of eating popcorn

不吃爆米花

he brings little pieces of chicken in Tupperware

他自带保鲜盒装的鸡肉片

and a thermos full of soup

还有保温瓶盛满了热汤

He's not that bad

他没那么糟啦

Hey Stuart got any plans Thursday night

斯尔图特你周四晚上有事吗

My uh my doctor's worried about my circulation

我的医生担心我的血液循环

so I was thinking about walking around the mall

所以我本来打算去商场走走

Why

怎么了

Hey you guys

你们好啊

Oh make sure to wear sensible shoes

记得穿舒服点的鞋子哦

Wil want to go to Star Wars Thursday

威尔周四想一起去看《星球大战》吗

Absolutely

当然好啊

Fine take Wil

好啊带威尔去吧

See if he brings you clam chowder

看他会不会给你们带蛤蜊浓汤

Okay okay okay okay okay

好吧好吧

Let's let's let's just recap our options

我们...我们再过一遍所有选项

All right we've got harp thing sheep thing

有竖琴演奏绵羊织毛

Wild thang

狂野做爱

Which do you think she'd prefer

你们觉得她最喜欢哪一个

Because I checked the Sheep and Wool Festival Web site

因为我查过羊及羊毛节的官网

and there's only 8 000 tickets left

只剩8千张票了

Sheldon being physical with Amy is a huge step for you

谢尔顿跟艾米发生肉体关系可是重大的一步啊

Yeah are you ready for this

是啊你准备好了吗

Intimacy in any form has been challenging for me

任何形式的亲密对我来说都是挑战

but I'd like to show her how important she is

但我想向她证明她对我有多重要

and it feels like now might be the right time

而我感觉现在就是最好的时机

Sheldon that's so beautiful

谢尔顿这理由太美了

Then it's settled

那就这么定了

Amy's birthday present will be my genitals

艾米的生日礼物就是我的生殖器

Thanks for taking me out

多谢你们带我出去

Well you're spending your birthday with Sheldon

既然你的生日要跟谢尔顿一起过

Why not celebrate early

何不跟我们提前庆祝呢

So where do you want to go

你想去哪里

I heard that new Mexican place on Green Street is good

我听说格林路上那间新的墨西哥餐厅不错

Sure sure

好啊

Or we could take you to get a bikini wax

或者我们可以带你去做比基尼蜜蜡脱毛

Why would I get a bikini wax for my birthday

为什么我生日要做比基尼蜜蜡脱毛

Uh I don't know It was just a thought

不知道我就随口一说

I think I'll just stick to Mexican

我觉得还是去吃墨西哥菜好了

Great And then maybe after we can watch a dirty movie

很好吃完以后我们可以去看部小黄片

and if anybody has any questions about what happened or how

如果有人对怎么回事或怎么做有疑问

we can answer them

我们可以负责解答

Okay what is going on

好吧到底怎么回事

Oh we just want you to be prepared

我们只是希望你对

for any surprises that might happen tomorrow

明天可能发生的惊喜做好准备

What surprises

什么惊喜

We don't want to spoil anything

我们不想剧透坏了惊喜

but you should know that

但谢尔顿说

Sheldon said he's ready to be physical

他做好跟你发生肉体关系的准备了

You shut your damn mouth

你们少他妈逗我玩

You actually heard him say this

你们真的听到他这么说了吗

Yes He said he wants to do something

是的他说了他想做点什么

to show you how much you mean to him

来证明你对他有多重要

I I can't believe it I

真不敢相信

I don't know what to say

我不知道该说什么了

Well we're really happy for you

我们很为你高兴

and we know how much he cares

我们都知道他多看重...

I do know what to say Let's get me waxed

我知道说什么了快给我下体除毛

Why isn't it ever Angie Dickinson's bedroom

为什么永远都不是安吉·迪金森的卧室

以美腿闻名的性感女星

You're back

你回来了

It it doesn't seem like it's up to me

这似乎不是我能决定的

I suppose you're here because

我猜你来是因为

I've decided to be physical with my girlfriend

我决定跟我的女朋友发生肉体关系了

and I've never done that before

而我以前从来没有做过

E Excuse me for a moment

稍等一下

Well it was worth a shot

至少努力过了

So can you help me

所以你能帮我吗

Uh all right Um

好吧

once once the man gets

当一个男人

the the woman out of her out of her bloomers

把一个女人的灯笼内裤脱掉

Oh no Not that

不不是那个

I I understand the mechanics

我知道"做"法

Oh good good 'Cause uh

很好因为...

I have no idea what kids these days are

我完全不知道现在的孩子们

calling their their parts

都怎么称呼他们的"部位"

I think they say "junk"

他们好像是说"大屌"[垃圾]

What is happening to this world

这世界到底怎么了

What what do you actually need to know

你究竟想知道什么

This is an important night for us

那一晚将对我俩来说都很重要

and I'm worried I might be overwhelmed

我有点担心自己会太紧张

and ruin everything

然后搞砸了

Sheldon if if you're with the right person

谢尔顿如果对方是对的人

it it'll be okay

一切都会水到渠成

Thank you Arthur

谢谢你亚瑟

You are the wisest of the wise

你是世界上最有智慧的人

Well that's that's very nice of you to say

很高兴你能这么说

but I think I'm just an expression of

可我觉得我只不过是

of your unconscious mind

你潜意识的映射

Oh sure Yeah

当然了

Well you're fun to look at

但是看着你挺好玩的嘛

Tonight's the night

就是今晚了

Yeah the wait is finally over

是啊终于等到了

I know Then you'll finally stop talking about it

对啊你们终于可以不再提这事了

Ready to go Let's do this

-准备好了吗 -来吧

Have fun guys

祝你们开心哦

We will I can't believe Sheldon gave this up

-我们会的 -不敢相信谢尔顿会放弃这个

I know We're gonna have so much more fun than him

是啊我们肯定会玩得比他开心得多

No they're not

不他们不会的

Knowing them they will

依他们的尿性会的

T minus 15 minutes

倒数15分钟

Oh did you hear from Wil

威尔联系你了吗

Yeah he's on his way

他在路上了

Time for bladder check

膀胱检查时间

Check

检查完毕

Check

检查完毕

Check Wait

检查完毕等等

Screw it I'm holding it

管他的我决定忍着

What is everyone booing at

大家都在嘘什么

Hey guys What's up

各位你们好吗

Um hey Wil What you doin'

威尔你在干什么

I was on Star Trek I'm just rooting for the home team

我演过《星际迷航》当然要支持自家人

Star Trek stinks

《星际迷航》烂透了

Yeah Live long and suck it

是吗生生不息滚你妈逼

Birthday girl

生日女孩

Birthday girl Birthday girl

生日女孩生日女孩

Come in

快进来

Hi Sheldon

你好谢尔顿

Hello Sorry I'm late

你好抱歉我迟到了

I also got you a balloon

我本来还给你带了一个气球

but it floated away and I chased it for a while

可是它飞走了我追了好久

That's okay Come on in

没关系快进来吧

Thank you Mm hmm

谢谢你

Um I'll I'm gonna go put these in water

我拿个花瓶装上

Ooh this is different hmm

感觉很不一样嘛

Candles and music

蜡烛和音乐

Do you like it

你喜欢吗

It's kind of spooky

有点吓人

I can change it back

我可以换回原样

No no no It's your birthday

不不这是你的生日

As long as no one jumps out in a hockey mask I'll be fine

只要面具杀人魔杰森别突然跳出来就好

所以...

What'd you have in mind for tonight

你今晚想做什么

I thought I could take you out to a nice birthday dinner

我本来想带你去吃一顿生日大餐

If we pick a place east of here we might find the balloon

如果选个东边的餐厅说不定还能把气球找回来

Um that sounds nice but

听起来不错可是...

I'm not really hungry right now

我现在不是很饿

I thought maybe

我想咱们不如...

we could do presents first

先"上"礼物吧

All right

好呀

I should probably tell you something about this gift

关于这件礼物我有些事要先告诉你

You mean before you

你是说在你...

give it to me

"给我"之前吗

Yes

是的

May I ask you a question before I

我可以先问一个问题吗在我...

give it to you

"给你"之前

Of course Why are we saying

-当然 -为什么我们要把

"give it to you" like that

"给你"说得这么诡异

Sheldon

谢尔顿

I know your present is

我知道你的礼物...

for us to be intimate tonight

就是今夜与我共享鱼水之欢

I see

我明白了

Is that all right

你愿意吗

I'm sorry but this is a litigious society

抱歉如今这社会动不动就告上法庭

I'm gonna need verbal consent

我需要你的口头同意

Yes

求之不得

You know what let me pull a quick contract off the Internet

我还是上网下载一个简易合同吧

So if you don't like Star Wars why are you here

如果你不喜欢《星球大战》那你干嘛还来呢

Oh I'm just having fun

我只是图一乐

Everyone takes Star Wars so seriously

每个人都对这电影这么认真看待

Like if the movie's bad it's gonna ruin their lives

就好像电影拍砸了他们的人生也就毁了

Is it bad Did you hear something

电影拍砸了吗你听说了什么吗

Oh my God It's bad Somebody kill me

亲娘耶拍砸了谁赶紧来杀了我吧

See That's what I mean

看到没我就是指这种人

When you wake up in the morning whether this is

当你明早从晨光中醒来

the greatest movie ever or a total piece of crap

不管这电影是神作一部还是狗屎一坨

your life isn't gonna change at all

你的生活都不会有任何改变

He's right

他说得对

Yeah

没错

No matter what happens

不管发生什么

we're coming back tomorrow to watch it again

我们明天都会再来看一遍

Do you think Sheldon's actually gonna go through with it

你觉得谢尔顿真的会跟艾米滚成床单吗

I don't know

我不知道

He said he's ready

他说他已经准备好了

Yeah but he also swore this was the year

没错可是他还发誓说

he'd be able to pull the guts out of a pumpkin

今年一定有勇气把南瓜内瓤掏出来呢

Well I'm gonna stay positive I mean we talked

我对谢尔顿有信心我们聊过了

I told him what women like and after he stopped giggling

我告诉他女生的喜好他咯咯傻笑了一阵后

he seemed pretty sure of himself

看起来相当有自信

你好

Hello

你好

So um

那个...

should I get under the covers with you

我该跟你一起钻进被子里吗

All right

好呀

Hello Hi

-你好 -你好啊

Why are you shaking Are you cold

你怎么在发抖你很冷吗

I'm just um really nervous

我只是有点太紧张

Why

为什么

I've been waiting for this for so long

我等待这一刻等得太久了

I've just built it up in my head

我...脑补过太多

I don't know what to expect

我不知道接下来该期待什么

Neither do I

我也不知道

But we can find out together

但是...我们可以一起找出答案

Okay

好的

I'm really nervous

我真的好紧张

I know

我知道

We've been waiting so long for this

我们等待这一刻等得太久了

And we've built it up in our heads so much

我们脑补过太多

Guys it's just a movie

各位这只是部电影而已

That's true

没错

He's right It is

-他说得对 -的确

Although we all remember Jar Jar

不过我们都记得扎扎

受许多影迷讨厌的星战角色

Leonard I I'm scared again

莱纳德我又开始提心吊胆了

几个小时后

Well I enjoyed that more than I thought I would

我比预想中更享受

Me too

奴家也是

I look forward to your next birthday

我很期待你下次过生日时

when we do it again

我们再做一次

That works for me

这样奴家也愿意

I enjoyed that more than I thought I would

我比预想中更享受这电影呢

I don't think I can walk right now

我爽得都走不动了

Uh Sheldon

谢尔顿

Sheldon

谢尔顿

Arthur

亚瑟

What are you doing here

你在这里干什么

I I don't think I need any more advice

我不需要什么建议了

I I was just curious

我只是好奇嘛

How How'd it go

那事儿最后怎么样了

It was amazing

非常棒

I I saw it a few days later

几天之后我去看了

What a movie

电影超赞

But uh what what about Amy

那... 艾米呢

Uh uh she liked it fine

她也挺喜欢的

But she doesn't have the history with the franchise I do

不过她不像我对这个系列作有感情

Okay

好吧

Good good talk

好吧聊得挺开心

就是图一乐

看剧其实就像本集里电影院中几个人说的那段一样