生活大爆炸-S06E16_生活大爆炸

S01

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You'll never believe what happened to me at work today

你绝对想不到我今天工作时遇上了什么事

This old guy was choking on his food and I saved his life

一个老头子吃东西噎到了我救了他一命

You're kidding Did you Heimlich him

真的吗你对他用了海姆立克急救法吗

No I said "Oh my God I think that old guy's choking "

没有我说天啊我觉得他噎着了

and then one of the busboys Heimlich'ed him

然后一个勤杂工对他用了海姆立克急救法

You're a hero

你真是英雄

Yeah that was the point of the story

我就是这意思

Oh yeah speaking of work do you know

说到工作你周四晚上

if you have Thursday night off

是不是不用上班

Um I think so Why

好像是怎么了

What do you mean why It's Valentine's Day

什么叫"怎么了" 那天是情人节啊

Oh right

对哦

Yeah we can do something

我们可以约个会

You could be a little more into it

你可以表现得更热情一点

No I'm into it I'm into it

我很热情我很热情

Just there's so much pressure to make the night special

只是要想度过一个特别之夜压力好大

and it never works out

而且结果总不尽如人意

Okay well this time it's going to be different

今年的情人节会有所不同的

Because I am like a romance ninja

因为我就像一个浪漫忍者

You don't see it coming and then bam

出乎你意料突然一下

Romance watch out hearts kisses love ooh ya

浪漫注意心形亲亲爱情

You know sometimes I think I've made you

有时我以为我把你改造得

so much cooler than you used to be

比以前酷多了

and then you go and do that

然后你就会闹腾两下证明我错了

So in conclusion

总而言之

I believe the painful sensation felt

我认为吃完辣椒后

after passing a meal of spicy chilies

排泄时感受到的痛苦

is proof that the rectum does possess the sense of taste

证明了直肠的确有味觉

I concur but you changed the subject

我同意但你改变了话题

What are we doing for Valentine's Day

我们情人节有什么安排

Oh you caught that did you

被你发现了

第六季第十六集

生活大爆炸

Okay

好

Okay

行

Okay

可以

Okay

没问题

Okay

好的啦

Okay

好

Everything okay

一切都还"好"吗

Bernie's a little cranky

妮妮有些暴躁

since she's been working like 17 hours a day

因为她一天工作17个小时

And I've got a lot on my plate too because I've been

我也没闲着因为我一直

busting my tail playing Assassin's Creed

都在忙着玩《刺客信条》

Hey Stuart

斯图尔特

you got anything going on for Valentine's Day

你情人节有什么安排吗

Not really

没有

Other than hiding all the sharp objects around here

只是把这里所有尖锐的东西都藏起来

and white knuckling it till morning

然后紧张兮兮到天明

What do you got going on

你打算干什么

Oh well I was going to spend the night

我本打算和我的小宝贝

with my special little lady but uh

共度今晚但是

she got worms and then I had to take her to the vet

它长了寄生虫所以我得送它去看兽医

There must be something we can do

肯定能找到事情打发时间的

Well uh how about you keep the store open late

不如你晚点关门

and we throw a party for all the people

我们举办一个派对

who don't have dates

邀请所有没约会的人

That actually sounds kind of nice

听起来真是个好主意

Yeah the theme will be that the greatest love

派对主题是一个男人所拥有的

a man can have is the love he has with himself

最伟大的爱就是对自己的爱

That's good

挺好

Or maybe something a little less "Hand in the pants "

或者换个听着不那么像打飞机的主题

Oh Alex excellent

艾利克斯太好了

I have a research problem

我有个研究问题

that I believe you can help with

我相信你能助我一臂之力

Oh Dr Cooper thank you

库珀博士谢谢

I've been waiting for an opportunity

我一直在等待一个机会

to contribute to your scientific work

为你的科研做出贡献

Oh no no That's not going to happen no

不不没那可能绝对没

What I need you to do is find a Valentine's gift

我是要你为我的女朋友

for my girlfriend

挑情人节礼物

You realize I passed up an opportunity

你知道我推掉了

to work at Fermilab to take this job with you

费米实验室的工作而选择与你合作吧

美国最重要的物理学研究中心之一

Well I guess those chaps will have to have

看来那些小伙子们得找别人

someone else buy their girlfriends presents

来给他们的女友买礼物了

Now here is

这里有

Let's see

瞧瞧

This is

这里

This is about $2 000

这里大概是两千块

Um I think she likes monkeys and the color gray

我觉得她喜欢猴子和灰色

Contribute to my work

为我的科研做出贡献

Ah kids say the darnedest things

小孩子真是会胡扯

Hey you coming to lunch

去吃中饭吗

Yeah one second

稍等片刻

Come here I want to show you something

过来给你看个东西

What you looking at

你在看什么呢

Well I was trying to come up with something

我想送个非常浪漫的

really romantic to give Bernadette

情人节礼物给伯纳黛特

for Valentine's Day since she's been

因为她最近

such a pain in the ass

真的很讨厌

You can't find a card that says that

找不到上面写着"你很讨厌"的贺卡吗

Check it out

来看看

I used the atomic force microscope

我动用了材料科学实验室的

in the material science lab and wrote our initials

原子力显微镜在沙粒千分之一大小的心形上

in a heart 1/1 000 the size of a grain of sand

刻上了我俩姓名首字母

Oh that's cool

太帅了

A micro valentine for a microbiologist

给微生物学家准备的"微小"情人节礼物

From her micro husband

她"微小"的丈夫送的

That is amazing

太棒了

How long did this take you

你花了多长时间

Mmm about 12 hours

大概12个小时

I pulled an all nighter

我忙活了整个通宵

Yeah I know it really took a bite

我知道我的游戏时间

out of my video game time

惨遭侵占

What are you and Penny doing

你和佩妮打算干什么

Oh I'm going to take her to a nice restaurant for dinner

我打算带她去高级餐厅共进晚餐

Oh that's not bad but as far as romance goes

还不错但从浪漫的角度来说

I think my gift hits it right out of

我觉得我的礼物完全胜过了...

Want to come to dinner with us Yes please

-想和我们共进晚餐吗 -带上我吧

Okay

好

Amy will be here shortly

艾米马上就会到

expecting the perfect Valentine's gift so

她在期待超赞的情人节礼物所以

you're up kid

该你了丫头

Dazzle me Go

尽请支招吧

Okay I think I have some really great choices

我确实有几个妙招

I went on Amy's Facebook page

我到艾米的Facebook主页上

and read up on her interests

了解了一下她的喜好

Now see I never would have thought to do that

瞧吧我就绝对想不到这样做

Clearly I made a good choice

很明显把此事交给你来办

farming this out to you

真是太英明了

But I am telling you

你得知道

Amy hit the boyfriend jackpot

艾米找到我做男朋友可真是中了头奖

Anyway my socks are on

总之我脚上有袜子

knock socks off 给人惊喜

Let's knock them off

快快把它们吓掉吧

Well um I know she loves playing the harp

我知道她喜欢弹竖琴

so I found this beautiful music box

所以我找到了这个精致的音乐盒

that plays one of her favorite songs

弹奏的是她最喜欢的曲子

Now Amy already has a real harp

可是艾米已经有真正的竖琴了

And it can play any song

那玩意可以弹任何曲子

What are you trying to pull here

这一招的高明之处在哪

No I just thought it would be Next

-不我只是觉得这个 -下一个

Okay

好吧

Um I know she's a fan of The Canterbury Tales

我知道她很喜欢《坎特伯雷故事集》

英国诗人乔叟的著名诗体短篇小说集

so I found

所以我找到了

this cool map

这张很酷的地图

that illustrates the characters' journey through England

上面标明了书中人物在英国的旅行路线

I thought we could put it in a really nice frame

我们可以选个漂亮的框子裱起来

But she's got Google Maps on her phone

但她的手机里装了谷歌地图

I don't know how to respond to that

我词穷了

Well I hope it's with a third good option

我希望还有第三个不错的选择

because these first two blah

这前两个也太逊了

Okay

好吧

Well uh luckily I saved the best for last

幸运的是我把最好的留在最后了

Since Amy's a neuroscientist

艾米是个神经学家

I did some research and found out

我做了点调查发现

that Santiago Ramony Cajal

圣地亚哥·拉蒙尼·卡哈尔

the father of modern neuroscience

现代神经科学之父

did lots of hand drawings of brain cells

曾绘制过许多脑细胞的手绘图

And I managed to find

而我想办法拿到了

this signed print

这幅有其签名的版本

Oh this is truly remarkable

这个可真了不起

Thank you

谢谢

I think I'll keep it for myself

我自己收下了

What about your girlfriend

那你的女朋友呢

It's too late I call dibs

太晚了我说了这个归我了

This place is really beautiful

这家餐厅真是不错

Wah romance ninja

浪漫忍者

Sorry we're late

抱歉迟到了

No problem We just sat down

没关系我们刚坐下

Mmm would you like some wine

想来点红酒吗

Yeah fill her up

好给我倒上

I'll tell you when to stop

叫你停再停

Is everything okay

一切都还好吗

Oh bite me

你奈我何

Look we can still have a nice night

我们今晚还是可以开开心心的

Just tell me where it is

告诉我在哪就行了

Maybe if you did what you said you were going to do I'd tell you

你要是能说到做到我就会告诉你了

Uh where what is

什么东西在哪

She hid my XBOX like I'm a child

她像对付小孩一样把我的游戏机藏起来了

Yeah and my mom got me that for my birthday

那可是我妈妈给我的生日礼物

so if you don't give it back I'm telling

你要是不还给我我就告状去

I've been working late every night

我每天都工作到很晚

All I asked was that he

我只不过是要求他

clean the apartment and do one load of laundry

把家里收拾干净洗一次衣服

But did he do it No

但他做了吗没有

He just kept on playing that stupid game

他就那么心安理得地玩那蠢游戏

You like pushing buttons so much

你这么喜欢按按钮

try pushing them on the washing machine

干嘛不按按洗衣机的按钮

I said I'm sorry

我道过歉了

Sorry doesn't clean my underpants buddy

道歉可洗不了我的内裤哥们

I told you turn them inside out

我跟你说过了翻过来穿就行了

And I told you to bite me

然后我说我不愿意你奈我何

Trying to have a magical night here guys

我们还想度过美好时光呢

Oh son of a bitch What

-见鬼 -怎么了

Nothing Nothing

没什么

No tell me

说嘛

It's just this guy I used to date

那是我的前男友

Until he cheated on me with my friend Gretchen

后来他背着我和我的朋友格雷琴偷腥

who's here with him now

也就是和他在一起那女的

You're kidding

不是吧

And it looks like she lost a lot of weight damn it

她好像瘦了不少可恶

I know it's not ideal

我知道他们的出现让你不开心

but don't let them ruin our night

但没必要让他们毁了我们的夜晚

No you're totally right

对你说得对

She could be skinny 'cause she's dying

她可能是因为快死了所以这么瘦

That's the spirit

这么想就对了

You know what screw them

管他们的呢

Our night is going to be way more special than theirs

我们的夜晚会比他们的难忘许多

Yeah

对

What

怎么了

Oh you got to be kidding me

逗姐玩呢是吧

Oh my God yes

天啊我愿意

Of course I'll marry you

我愿意嫁给你

Two can play this game

谁说我们不行了

Penny Get up

-佩妮 -给我起来

All right

好

It's nice that all the people who are lonely on Valentine's Day

所有在情人节没有伴侣的单身人士

can come here tonight and be together

能来这里聚聚真好

Yeah I'm really looking forward to it

是啊我很期待

In fact there's no place I would rather be than here

事实上我就想待在这里哪也不想去

Except on a date with anybody

除非有任何人愿意和你约会

Literally anybody

真的任何人都可以

You know you and I have so much fun hanging out

我们在一起总是很开心

If you were a girl

如果你是个女孩的话

all our problems would be solved

我们所有问题就迎刃而解了

What

什么

Oh yeah think about it

你仔细想想

We'd hang out

我们可以总在一起玩

we'd read comic books we'd see movies

可以一起看漫画一起看电影

It'd be like the best relationship ever

这算得上是世间最美妙的关系了

That does sound nice

听起来是挺好的

Then I'd take you home slip off your little black dress

然后我送你回家脱下你的小黑裙

and just pile drive you into oblivion

把你搞到七晕八素分不清南北

What

什么

Oh I can't believe

真不敢相信

he's going to marry the girl he cheated on me with

他要和破坏我们感情的小三结婚了

Isn't it kind of nice

这不是挺美好的吗

I mean he was with the wrong person

他曾经爱上了错误的对象

and now he found the right person

如今终于找到他的真爱

What so I'm the wrong person

怎么我成了错误的对象吗

Maybe you want to be with Gretchen too

那你是不是也想和格雷琴在一起啊

They do look happy

他们看起来挺开心的

Yeah maybe tonight

就算是今晚开心

But a year from now he'll be

但一年以后他就会

crawling under the sink looking for his Xbox

潜伏在水槽底下摸寻他的游戏机了

Well he will

他肯定会的

You know what Why don't we just forget about them

算了吧何不忘掉他们

and enjoy our Valentine's Day

好好享受我们自己的情人节

Yes absolutely

好的没问题

Now they're doing that phony

现在他们居然玩那种假到爆的

link arm drink thingy

交杯酒把戏

I totally taught him that

这一招还是我教他的呢

I thought we were letting it go

我以为我们说好不管他们了

We were it's just it's not fair okay

当然只是这太不公平了好吗

They're bad people

他们不是什么好人

It's not supposed to end happy for them

不配拥有幸福大结局

it's supposed to end happy for me

明明应该是我找到最后的幸福

It did end happy for you

你已经找到你的幸福了啊

You're here with me

你现在和我在一起

Yeah yeah I know

是是我知道

Okay this is getting a little hard to not take personally

你这么敷衍的样子很难不让我受伤

Oh come on don't make this about you

得了别又扯到你身上去了

Oh I'm not It's about you

不是我这是你的问题

Yeah well whatever okay

随便怎么都好行吗

I told you Valentine's Day sucks

我告诉过你情人节就没好事

This one does and you're the reason why

这个情人节不好过而你就是罪魁祸首

What

什么

You know compared to them

和他们比起来

I'm feeling pretty good about us

我觉得我们俩还过得挺不错的

Me too

我也这么觉得

How about we blow off dessert go home early

不如我们不吃甜点早点回家

I'll do that laundry

然后我把衣服都洗了

Thank you

谢谢你

I love you

我爱你

Love you too

我也爱你

So where'd you hide it

你到底把游戏机藏哪里了

Where you'd never look

你永远想不到去看的地方

Damn it it's in the washing machine

见鬼原来是藏在洗衣机里了

Hello

你好

Hello

你好

Happy Valentine's Day

情人节快乐

Okay

好的

Shall we go to dinner

我们去吃饭吧

Hang on

等一下

As you know I had planned a traditional evening

你知道我原本计划了传统式的浪漫之夜

of romance and gifts

还有互赠礼物

Yes

是的

and as you know

而你也知道

I planned to pretend to enjoy it

我计划全程假装乐在其中

I've been working on this facial expression all day

我已经练习这种面部表情一整天了

And I appreciate your effort

我感谢你的努力

but upon contemplation

但仔细一想

I decided I was being selfish

我觉得自己太自私了

So I canceled our dinner reservations

所以我取消了晚餐订位

and came up with an even better way

想到了另一个更好的办法

to celebrate Valentine's Day

来庆祝情人节

What is that

什么办法

By doing none of it

就是什么都不干

no dinner

不吃什么晚餐

no romance no gifts

不要什么浪漫不送任何礼物

We stay here order a pizza

我们留在家里点个披萨外送

and watch one of your beloved

看一部你最爱的

Star War Trek things

星际大战之类的片子

Really

你说真的吗

Well that's what you'd love isn't it

这才是你真心最爱的不是吗

More than anything

胜过世上的一切

Well then

好吧

that's what we're going to do

那我们就这么做吧

Well I don't know what to say

我不知该说什么了

This is the most thoughtful gift

这可是我收到过的所有礼物中

that anyone's ever given me

最有心的一件了

And that's including an amazing gift

比我上午送给自己的

that I gave myself earlier today

一件超级棒的礼物还要好

I'm your girlfriend That's my job

我是你的女朋友这是我的责任

And I know gift giving puts a lot of pressure on you

我知道挑礼物这事总是让你倍感压力

so whatever you got me you can return

所以不管你准备了什么给我你都可以退掉它

不行

No after everything you didn't do for me tonight

不就因为今晚你什么都没为我做

I want you to have it

我希望你收下这个礼物

What's this

这是什么

Read it

读读看

"Sheldon Cooper

谢尔顿·库珀

Caltech University employee information"

加利福尼亚理工大学员工资料

At the bottom

读读下面

"In case of emergency please contact

一旦发生紧急情况请与

Amy Farrah Fowler "

艾米·菲拉·福勒联系

And there's my phone number

还有我的电话号码

This is the most beautiful gift you could've ever given me

这真是你给我的最美好的礼物了

Well I thought

反正我想

if I have a stroke or a kidney stone

如果我中风或者得了肾结石

who would I want to share that with

我会愿意和谁分享这件事呢

And you picked me

而你选择了我

It's like you said

就像你刚才说的

you're my girlfriend

你是我的女朋友

Oh Sheldon

谢尔顿

Okay

可以了

Stop ruining Valentine's Day and order my pizza

别扫情人节的雅兴快给我叫披萨外送

Night Yep

-晚安 -好的

You know what

知道吗

That was pretty crappy of you

你刚才真够差劲的

I mean all I wanted to do was give you a great night

我只想给你一个浪漫的情人之夜

and it's like you you went out of your way to destroy it

而你却竭尽所能地搞破坏

Yeah I know

没错

I'm a total bitch

我就是一个贱人

I'm not saying that Well I am

-我没这么说 -我是的

Fine you win You're a bitch

好吧拗不过你你是贱人

Why couldn't we just have a nice time

我们为什么不能好好过一个情人节

I don't know

我不知道

Maybe 'cause things are going so well between us lately

也许是因为最近我们进展太顺利了

and I've been really happy

我真的很开心

Okay you're gonna have to make a lot more sense than that

好吧你这解释让我更混乱了

Obviously I have some commitment issues

显然我有承诺恐惧症

Glaringly obvious Go on

有眼睛的人都看得出来继续说

As long as things keep going great between us

只要我们继续顺利交往下去

you'll keep asking me to marry you

你会不断向我求婚

and eventually I'm gonna end up saying yes

最终我会答应

and then we're gonna be married forever

然后我们就会天长地久

and the whole thing just freaks me out

整件事让我想起来就头皮发麻

Okay

好吧

I know I propose a lot

我知道我这人有喜欢求婚的毛病

So how about this

你看这样行不行

I promise I will never ask you to marry me again

我发誓我再也不会向你求婚

What what do you mean

你这是什么意思

Are you breaking up with me

你是要和我分手吗

不

No no no no

不是的

But if someday you decide you want to get married

但如果有一天你想结婚

you have to propose to me

你得向我求婚

Really Yes

-真的吗 -是的

It's all on you

主动权在你

But I got to tell you when the time comes

不过我得提醒你真到了那个时候

I want the whole nine yards

你一点也不能含糊

I want you down on one knee flowers

你得给我单膝跪地满地鲜花

I want to be swept off my feet

你得把我哄得芳心犹如小鹿乱撞

Yeah you got it

没问题

And I'm cool with surprises

我不反对来个惊喜

But nothing on a Jumbotron

但千万别来个大屏幕求婚

I don't want to cry on a big screen like that

我不想满球场的人看着我泪如雨下

Okay

好的

You know what

知道吗

This might be the wine talking

可能酒劲上来了

but I have a very important question to ask you

我有个非常重要的问题问你

You do

是吗

Leonard Hofstadter

莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德

Yes

什么事

will you be my valentine

你愿做我今夜的情人吗

Sorry Maybe next year

抱歉咱们明年再说吧

I'm just kidding

开个玩笑

Romance ninja Let's have sex

浪漫忍者杀到咱上床去吧

Thank you guys for doing this

多谢你们办这场派对

We're glad you could make it

很高兴你能来

Usually I spend Valentine's Day sad and alone

通常我在情人节这天是悲伤寂寞的

This year I'm just sad

今年我只是悲伤而已

What is it about this holiday that makes people so unhappy

你说这个节日怎么就令大家这么不开心呢

I know

就是说啊

I hate myself most of the time

大多数时候我都挺讨厌自己的

but tonight's the night I know everyone else does too

但今晚我知道其他人也好不到哪里去

I think you're cool

我觉得你挺酷的

Great

多谢你看得起

I got to tell you

我跟你们说

we've got to stop beating ourselves up like this

我们不能再这样自我折磨了

Excuse me everybody

各位不好意思

Can I have your attention please

请大家听我说几句

We're all here tonight because

今晚我们齐聚一堂是因为

we have no one to be with

我们没有另一半相陪

But that doesn't make us mutants

但这样并不代表我们是异种

The only mutants here are in these comic books

这里真正的异种全在漫画书里

We've got to stop defining our self worth

我们不能再以是否有恋爱对象

by whether or not we're in a relationship

来定义我们的自我价值

You know what I see when I look around

知道我放眼过去看到什么吗

I see a room full of great people

我看到一屋子了不起的人

So let's give ourselves a break

我们别再跟自己过不去了

We are a community

我们是一个联盟

and as long as we have each other

只要我们团结在一起

we're never truly alone

我们就不是寂寞的

That was cool

真是不错

What you said

你说的那些话

You really think so

你真这样想吗

Yeah I do

是的

Thank you

谢谢

Would you like to uh

你想不想

get a cup A cup of coffee or

去喝杯咖啡

Okay

好的

Later losers

哥先走一步了废柴联盟

Hello

喂

Another medical emergency

又是急诊

What's wrong with him now

这次他又怎么了

I seriously doubt he was bitten by a Chinese bird spider

我严重怀疑他是不是真被虎纹捕鸟蛛咬了

直译名为中国鸟蜘蛛

How exactly does a bump feel Asian

一个肿块怎么可能有亚洲感

Just put him on the phone

让他接电话

Sheldon I am not driving over there again

谢尔顿我不会再开车过去了

Because I drove over there yesterday

因为我昨天开车去了

for a brain tumor that turned out to be

你说得了脑瘤结果却是

an ice cream headache

冰淇淋吃快了导致头痛

Yes I still want to be your emergency contact

是的我依然想做你的紧急联系人

Yes you can eat your ice cream too fast

是的你可以吃冰淇淋吃得过快

and also have a brain tumor

同时又有脑瘤

I'm on my way

我马上来

Brain tumor would explain a lot

真是脑瘤很多事情就说得通了