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All right I'm moving my infantry division
现在我调动步兵师
augmented by a battalion of orcs from Lord of the Rings
和指环王中的半兽人兵团
We flank the Tennessee volunteers and the North once again wins the Battle of Gettysburg
从两翼包夹田纳西的志愿者军团
Not so fast Remember the South still has two infantry divisions Plus Superman and Godzilla
没这么容易 南方还有两个步兵师 再加上超人和哥斯拉
No no no Orcs are magic Superman is vulnerable to magic
半兽人是魔法部队 超人最怕魔法
Not to mention
更别提...
you already lost Godzilla to the Illinois Cavalry and Hulk
哥斯拉早已被伊利诺伊骑兵和绿巨人消灭
Why don't you just have Robert E Lee charge the line
为什么不让罗伯特·李将军冲锋?
with Shiva and Ganesh
他可以带上湿婆和格涅沙
You guys ready to order Hang on honey
- 可以点餐了吗? - 稍等 宝贝
Shiva and Ganesh
湿婆和格涅沙
the Hindu gods against the entire Union army
印度教之神? 对抗整个北部联军?
And orcs
还有半兽人
I'll be back
我稍候再来
Excuse me
不好意思
Ganesh is the Remover of Obstacles and Shiva is the Destroyer
象头神格涅沙擅长清除障碍 湿婆是毁灭之神
When the smoke clears Abraham Lincoln will be speaking Hindi and drinking mint juleps
当硝烟散尽 林肯将会说印第语 喝南方的薄荷饮料
All right my boss says you have to either order or leave and never come back
我老板说你们要么点餐 要么永远给他滚蛋
What do you recommend for someone who worked up a man sized appetite
对于做了一早上的举重和有氧锻炼 冒着甜美气息的我
from a morning of weight training and cardio funk
有什么推荐菜式?
A shower
洗澡
I'll take the Heart Smart platter
我要个奶酪拼盘
All right thank you and Sheldon
好 谢谢你 Sheldon呢?
We don't eat here
我们没在这里吃过
I don't know what's good
不知道什么好吃
Well it's all good
都很好吃
Statistically unlikely
概率上不太可能
Just get a hamburger
就点一个汉堡
You like hamburgers
你喜欢汉堡
I like the hamburgers where we usually have hamburgers
我喜欢我们常去的那家汉堡店的汉堡
You can't make the assumption that I'll like the hamburgers here
不能假定我也喜欢这里的汉堡
I'm sorry
对不起
Give him a hamburger
给他一个汉堡
All right which one
好吧 哪种?
The Classic Burger the Ranch House Burger
经典汉堡 农家汉堡
the Barbecue Burger or the Kobe Burger
烧烤汉堡 柯比汉堡?
Can't we just go to Big Boy
能不能去大胖汉堡店?
They only have one burger the Big Boy
他们只有一种汉堡 大胖汉堡
Well the Barbecue Burger is like the Big Boy
烧烤汉堡跟大胖汉堡挺像的
Excuse me in a world that already includes a Big Boy
对不起 既然世上已经有大胖汉堡
why would I settle for something like a Big Boy
为什么我们要满足于像大胖汉堡呢?
Because you're not at Big Boy
因为你不在大胖汉堡店!
Fine I'll have the Barbecue Burger
好吧 那我要烧烤汉堡
Make it two
我也要这个
Waitresses don't yell at you at Big Boy
大胖汉堡店的侍应从不高声训我
Hey Leonard Hi guys
- 嘿 Leonard - 你们好
Hey Hi Leslie
你好 Leslie
I didn't know you ate here We don't
- 不知道你们会来这里吃饭 - 确实不会
This is a disturbing aberration
这次是烦扰的例外
Leslie this is Penny
Leslie 他是Penny
She lives across the hall from Sheldon and me
她住在我和Sheldon的对面
And walks in quiet beauty like the night
她走在美的光彩中 像夜晚 (诗人拜伦的名句)
Howard I've asked you not to do that
Howard 我已经说了 别这样
Leslie and I do research together at the university
Leslie和我在同个实验室做研究
Oh wow a girl scientist
哇 女科学家
Yep come for the breasts stay for the brains
没胸 只好多长点大脑
So I'm glad I ran into you
碰见你太好了
The Physics Department string quartet needs a new cellist
物理系弦乐四重奏还缺一个大提琴
What happened to Elliot Wong
Elliot Wong怎么啦?
He switched over to high energy radiation research
他调到高能辐射课题组了
had a little mishap and now the other guys are uncomfortable sitting next to him
发生一些小意外 其他团员怕坐他身边被辐射
So are you in
你来不来?
Yeah sure why not
当然来
Great we rehearse on Tuesdays at your place
太好了 周二去你那里彩排
Why at my place
为什么去我那里?
Yeah Department of Energy said our regular space is kind of a hot zone
能源部说我们原来 排练的地方现在是危险区
Nice meeting you
很高兴见到你
Yeah you too
我也是
Leonard I didn't know you played the cello
Leonard 不知道你会拉大提琴
Yeah my parents felt that naming me Leonard
是啊 我父母觉得给我取名Leonard
and putting me in Advanced Placement classes wasn't getting me beaten up enough
让我上天才班 还不够招人恨的
If you're into music I happen to be a human beatbox
你喜欢音乐吗? 我会学架子鼓
Really
真的?
I'm actually not that into music
其实我不是太喜欢音乐
So hey your friend's really cute Anything going on with you two
你那个朋友不错 你们俩是不是有点情况?
Leslie
L - Leslie?
No no
没有
What are you kidding He asked her out once
- 怎么可能? - 他约过她一次
It was an embarrassing failure
尴尬地失败了
Thank you Sheldon
多谢 Sheldon
Oh I'm sorry
噢 对不起
Was that supposed to be a secret
这个需要保密吗?
Aw that's too bad
哦 太可惜了
You guys'd make a cute couple
你们本可以做一对甜蜜情侣
Oh dear
我的天
What's the matter
怎么了?
She didn't take my order
她没问我点什么
How can she take your order
她怎么问你?
when you're too neurotic to talk to her
你紧张得连话都不会说
Nevertheless this will be reflected in her tip
尽管如此 这将反映在她的小费上
What did Penny mean "You'd make a cute couple "
Penny说"你们本可以做一对甜蜜情侣" 什么意思?
Well I assume she meant the two of you together would constitute a couple
我想她的意思是 你们两个在一起可以组成情侣
that others might consider cute
并且令其他人觉得你们甜蜜
An alternate and somewhat less likely interpretation
另一个不太可能的解释是
is that you could manufacture one
你们可以制造一对情侣
As in "Oh look Leonard and Leslie made Mr and Mrs Goldfarb Aren't they adorable "
例如 "快看 Leonard和Leslie所生的 Goldfarb夫妻 是不是很可爱?"
If Penny didn't know that Leslie had turned me down
如果Penny不知道Leslie拒绝过我
then it would unambiguously mean that she Penny thought I should ask her Leslie out
那么这一句的所指将十分清晰 即她(Penny)认为我应该追她(Leslie)
indicating that she Penny had no interest in me asking her Penny out
表明她(Penny)对于我 追求她(Penny)并无兴趣
But because she did know that I had asked Leslie out
但由于她知道我追过Leslie
and that she Leslie had turned me down then she Penny could be offering consolation
并且她(Leslie)已经拒绝我 那么她(Penny)可能只是安慰我
"That's too bad you would have made a cute couple "
"真可惜 你们本来 可以做一对甜蜜情侣..."
but while thinking "Good Leonard remains available "
并且暗想 "很好 Leonard还是单身"
You're a lucky man Leonard
你很幸运 Leonard
How so
怎么说?
You're talking to one of the three men
听你说话的人
in the western hemisphere capable of following that train of thought
是西半球仅有的三个 能跟得上你思维的人之一
Well what do you think
那么 你怎么看?
I said I could follow it I didn't say I care
我只是说我能跟上 不代表我有兴趣
Our whole universe was in a hot dense state
宇宙是个大火炉
Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started Wait
140亿年前大爆炸 哦稍等
The Earth began to cool
地球开始冷却 生物开始繁衍
The autotrophs began to drool Neanderthals developed tools
尼安得特尔人发明工具
We built the Wall We built the pyramids
我们建造墙瓦
Math Science History unraveling the mystery
我们创造金字塔 数学 科学 历史
That all started with a big bang
揭露奥秘
Bang
就从宇宙大爆炸开始!
By aBu 201705
天才也性感 第一季 第5集
I admire your fingering
我很欣赏你的指法
Thank you
谢谢
Maybe sometime you can try that on my instrument
也许你可以在我的"乐器"上演练一下
Good night guys Good job Thanks
- 晚安兄弟 练得不错 - 谢谢
See you next week
下周见
That was fun Leslie Thanks for including me
挺好玩的 Leslie 多谢你叫上我
You're welcome
不客气
If you're up for it
如果你有兴趣
we could practice that middle section again
我们可以练一下中间部分
Sure why not
当然好
Just so we're clear you understand that me hanging back to practice with you
说说清楚比较好 你知不知道我留下来陪你加练
is a pretext for letting you know that I'm sexually available
是一个铺垫 为了让你知道我是潜在性对象
Really
真的?
Yeah I'm good to go
是的 我随时可以
I thought you weren't interested in me
我以为你对我没兴趣
That was before I saw you handling that beautiful piece of wood between your legs
那是在看到你摆弄两腿之间 那块优雅的木头之前
You mean my cello
你是指大提琴?
No I mean the obvious crude double entendre
不 那是一个明显下流的双关
I'm seducing you
我在勾引你
No kidding
不是吧
What can I say I'm a passionate and impulsive woman
怎么说呢? 我是有激情的冲动型女人
So how about it
你说呢?
Gee Uh
这个 呃...
Is it the waitress
因为那个侍应生?
Penny
Penny?
What about her
她怎么了?
I thought I saw your pupils dilate when you looked at her
你看她的时候瞳孔放大
Which unless you're a heroin addict points to sexual attraction
这表明有性吸引力 除非是海洛因成瘾反应
Well I did have a poppy seed bagel for breakfast
我早餐吃了一个含罂粟籽的百吉饼
Which could cause a positive urine test for opiates
可能导致阿片碱尿检阳性
but certainly not dilate my pupils
但肯定不至于扩大瞳孔
So I guess there was no point in bringing it up
所以...我不知道为什么要说起这个
You and the waitress then
你和那个侍应生
No no
没有 没有
There's nothing going on between Penny and me
我和Penny之间没什么
So you're open to a sexual relationship
所以你可以建立性关系咯?
Yeah yeah I guess I am
可以可以 我想
Good
Yeah it is It is good
很好
Did you want to start now
要现在就开始?
Why don't we finish the section first
演完这一章吧
Oh okay
好的
A little musical foreplay Terrific
音乐前戏 不错
I'm g good to go Me too
- 我准备好了 - 我也是
Oh hey Sheldon What's going on
Sheldon 怎么了?
I need your opinion on a matter of semiotics
我需要符号学方面的帮助
I'm sorry
什么?
Semiotics The study of signs and symbols
符号学 研究符号和象征
It's a branch of philosophy related to linguistics
是语言学基本理论的分支
Okay sweetie I know you think you're explaing yourself
亲爱的 你以为自己在解释
but you're really not
但其实你没有
Just come with me
跟我来
Well
怎样?
Well what
什么怎样?
What does it mean
什么意思?
Oh come on you went to college
得了 你上过大学的
Yes but I was 11
我11岁上的
All right look
好吧 是这样
a tie on the doorknob usually means someone doesn't want to be disturbed
门把手上挂条领带 意思是不想被打扰
because they're you know gettin' busy
因为...因为在忙活
So you're saying Leonard has a girl in there
就是说Leonard跟个女孩在房间里?
Well either that or he's lost his tie rack and gotten really into Bryan Adams
不然就是他丢了衣架 还疯狂地喜欢上了Bryan Adams
Oh Leonard you magnificent beast
Leonard 你这了不起的野兽!
We really shouldn't be standing here
我们不该站这
This is very awkward
太尴尬了
Oh come on Leonard's had girls over before right
Leonard以前也带女孩回来过吧?
Oh yes but there's usually planning courtship advance notice
有的 但通常要计划 求爱 提前通知...
Last time I was able to book a cruise to the Arctic to see a solar eclipse
就像上次 我才有时间预订去北极看日食的旅行
You had to leave the state because your roommate was having sex
你室友要做爱 你就得离开这个州?
I didn't have to
不是得
The dates just happened to coincide
时间上完全是个巧合
So do you know who's in there
你知道里面那是谁吗?
Leonard
Well,there's Leonard.
And he's either with Leslie Winkle or a 1930s gangster
跟他在一起的不是Leslie Winkle 就是30年代的黑帮
Hmm good for him
恭喜他了
Good for Leonard
恭喜Leonard
Okay g'night
好吧 晚安
No no wait hold on
等等 别走!
What's the matter
怎么了?
I don't know what the protocol is here
我不知道这种情况下标准做法是什么
Do I stay Do I leave
我该留下来? 还是出去?
Do I wait to greet them with a refreshing beverage
他们出来时 要递上提神饮料吗?
Gee Sheldon you're asking the wrong girl
Sheldon 你问错人了
I'm usually on the other side of the tie
我通常在领带的另一边
Hi Leonard
你好 Leonard?
It's me Sheldon
是我 Sheldon
In the living room
我在客厅
I just I wanted you to know I saw the tie
我就想告诉你 我看到领带了
Message received
收到你的消息了
You're welcome
不客气
Carry on
继续吧
Give my best to Leslie
向Leslie问好
Big Boy
大胖汉堡...
Someone touched my board
有人动过我的写字板
Oh God my board
天啊 我的写字板!
Leonard Leonard
Leonard! Leonard!
Hey what's the matter
怎么了?
My equations someone's tampered with my equations
有人改过我的公式!
Are you sure Of course I'm sure
- 你确定? - 很确定!
Look at the beta function of quantum chromodynamics
看看量子色动力学的贝塔函数
The sign's been changed
符号被改了!
Oh yeah
对哦
But doesn't that fix the problem you've been having
那不正好解决了你的问题吗?
Are you insane Are you out of your mind
你疯了吗? 你傻了吗?
Are you hey look
你...哦 瞧瞧
That fixes the problem I've been having
这正好解决了我的问题
You're welcome
不客气
Youdid this
你干的?
Yeah I noticed it when I got up to get a glass of water
我起来喝水的时候发现的
So I fixed it and now you can show that quarks are asymptotically free at high energies
我改了 这样就能证明夸克 在高能状态下是渐进自由的
Pretty cool huh
很赞吧?
"Cool"
"赞"?
Listen I've got to get to the lab
我要去实验室了
Thanks for a great night
昨晚很棒 谢了
Thank you I'll see you at work
谢谢 上班见
Hold on Hold on
等等!
What
怎么?
Who told you you could touch my board
谁说你可以碰我的写字板的?
No one
没人
Yeah I don't come into your house and touch your board
我不会去你家碰你的写字板
There are no incorrect equations on my board
我的板子上没有错误的公式啊
Oh that is so
你真是...
so
太...
I'm sorry I've got to run
对不起 我要走了
If you come up with an adjective text me
如果你想好形容词 短信发我
Inconsiderate
不体谅
That is the adjective "inconsiderate "
就是这个词 "不体谅"
You can stare at your board all day Sheldon
你就算一直瞪着写字板 Sheldon
She's still going to be right
她还是对的
I'm not staring I'm mulling
我不是在瞪 我在思索
Oh hey Leonard Oh hi
- 嘿 Leonard - 嗨
So
那么...
how's it going
如何呀?
Pretty good
还好
Just pretty good
只是还好?
I'd think you were doing very good
我觉得是很好呀
Pretty very there's really no objective scale for delineating variations of "good "
"还" "很"... 描述"好"的变化程度 并没有客观的范围
Why do you ask
你为什么这么问?
Well a little bird told me that you and Leslie hooked up last night
小鸟告诉我昨晚你跟Leslie勾搭上了
Sheldon
Sheldon!
So is it serious Do you like her
你是来真的? 你喜欢她吗?
I don't
我不...
Th th that's really two different questions
那是两个不同的问题
Uh I'm not
我不是...
Sheldon we have to go
Sheldon 我们得走了!
Boy you're wound awfully tight for a man who's just had sexual intercourse
刚做完爱 你就这么赶时间?
All right well I'll talk to you later but I am so happy for you Leonard
迟些找你吧 真为你高兴 Leonard
Thank you
谢谢
What did she mean she's happy for me
她为我高兴是什么意思?
Is she happy that I'm seeing someone
她高兴我现在有伴了?
Or is she happy because she thinks that I'm happy
还是因为我开心所以她高兴?
Because anyone who cared for someone would want them to be happy
如果一个人喜欢别人 就会希望那人开心吧?
Even if the reason for their happiness made the first person unhappy
就算那人开心的理由让前者伤心
Because the second person though happy
因为开心的后者
is now romantically unavailable to the first person
就不能跟前者成为情侣了
Do you realize I may have to share a Nobel Prize with your booty call
你意识到我可能要跟你的炮友 分享诺贝尔奖吗?
You know what
你知道吗?
I'm being ridiculous
我真可笑
Who cares what Penny thinks
谁在乎Penny怎么想?
Leslie is a terrific girl
Leslie是个很棒的女孩
She's attractive
漂亮
We like each other
我们喜欢对方
She's extremely intelligent
她还超级聪明
She's not that intelligent
哪有很聪明
She fixed your equation
她改好了你的公式
She got lucky You don't believe in luck
- 那是走运 - 你根本不相信运气这种事
I don't have to believe in it for her to be lucky
我不信 但她也可以走运
Regardless I have a chance at a real relationship with Leslie
我跟Leslie可能有机会恋爱
I'm not going to pass that up for some
我不会放弃这段感情的
hypothetical future of happiness with a woman
而只为了跟一个可能希望 也可能不希望我和别人开心的女人
who may or may not want me to be happy
拥有一段假想的幸福未来
with a woman who is currently making me happy
而现在 那个别人已经让我很开心了
Leonard Yeah
- Leonard... - 啊?
I still don't care
我还是没兴趣
Hey Leslie Careful Leonard
- 嗨 Leslie - 小心 Leonard
Liquid nitrogen 320 degrees below zero
液氮 华氏零下320度
Why are smashing a flash frozen bana
你为什么要砸碎速冻香蕉?
Because I got a bowl of Cheerios and I couldn't find a knife Oh
我有碗谷物早餐 又找不到刀子
So anyway
那么...
Hello
你好
Uh what are you doing
你在干嘛?
Just extending the intimacy
跟你亲近一下
Hey do you want to slip over to the radiation lab and share a decontamination shower
想溜进辐射实验室 一起洗个去污澡吗?
Okay uh what exactly do you think's going on between us
你觉得我们俩之间发生了什么事?
I'm not sure but I think I'm about to discover how the bana felt
不知道 不过我可能就要 知道那香蕉什么感觉了
Listen Leonard neither of us are neuroscientists but we both understand the biochemistry of sex
Leonard 我们都不是神经学家 但是都了解性的生物化学原理
I mean dopamine in our brains is released across synapses causing pleasure
脑中的多巴胺在神经键中释放 造成快感
You stick electrodes in a rat's brain give him an orgasm button
在老鼠大脑里置入电极 再给它个高潮按键
he'll push that thing until he starves to death
它会一直按着那个键直到死
Well who wouldn't
谁不会呢?
Well the only difference between us and the rat
我们跟老鼠的区别就在于
is that you can't stick an electrode in our hypothalamus
无法在我们视丘下部置入电极
That's where you come in
所以你就派上用场了
Yeah well I'm just glad to be a part of it
很高兴能起到作用
So what happens now
那么现在如何?
Well I don't know about your sex drive but I'm probably good till New Year's
不知道你性欲多强烈 但我到新年之前应该都够了
Oh Okay Thank you
好吧 谢谢
Thankyou
谢谢你
You want to make plans for New Year's
要订新年的计划吗?
Whoa Leonard please You're smothering me
Leonard 拜托了 你逼得我喘不过气来
Oh Sorry
抱歉
Hey look
瞧瞧
It's Dr Stud
这不是种马博士吗!
Dr What
什么博士?
The blogosphere is a buzzin'with news of you
博客界的人都因为你跟Leslie
and Leslie Winkle makingeine kleine bang bangmusik
奏响的嘿休小夜曲兴奋不已呢!
What How did it get on the Internet
这事怎么传上互联网的?
I put it there
我放上去的
Well how did you know about it
你怎么知道的?
A little bird told us
小鸟告诉我们的
Apparently you are a magnificent beast
显然你是了不起的野兽
That part's true
那倒是真的
You know I think I may have misjudged this restaurant
我想我给这家餐厅的评价错了
No kidding
不是吧
I don't want to go out on a limb
我不想冒险
but I think we may be looking at my new Tuesday hamburger
但我可能找到了新的周二汉堡包
Your old Tuesday hamburger will be so brokenhearted
原来的周二汉堡会很伤心的
Way ahead of you
早想到了
I was thinking of moving Big Boy to Thursdays
我想把"大胖汉堡"挪到周四
and just dropping Souplantation
放弃"汤植园" (一家自助餐厅)
Really Yeah
- 真的? - 对
The name always confused me anyway
我总是搞不懂这名字
Souplantation
汤植园
You can't grow soup
汤可没法种植出来
So how's everything
如何呀?
Mmm Terrific
棒极了
You'll be happy to know that I plan to come here every Tuesday night
在可预见的将来 我打算每周二晚上都来这
for the foreseeable future
你开心吧
Really Oh yay
真的? 太好了~
Who do I speak to about permanently reserving this table
如果要永久订下这张台 要跟谁谈?
Um I don't know a psychiatrist
不知道 心理医生吧?
So hey
how are things with you and Leslie
你和Leslie如何?
Oh to be honest I don't think it's going to work out
说实话 我看没戏
Oh Oh that's too bad
啊 太糟了
Well hey don't worry
别担心
I'm sure there's someone out there who's just right for you
我相信会有合适你的人的
What did she mean by that
她那么说什么意思?
Was that just a generic platitude
是习惯性的说词?
or was that a subtle bid for attention
还是巧妙地在吸引我的注意?
You know why this hamburger surpasses the Big Boy
你知道这个比大胖汉堡强的原因吗?
This is a single decker hamburger whereas the Big Boy is a double decker
这是单层的 大胖汉堡是双层
This has a much more satisfying meat to bun to condiment ratio
这个汉堡的肉 面包和调料的比例 更令人满意
Are you even listening to me
你在听我说话吗?
Of course I'm listening
当然 在听
Blah blah hopeless Penny delusion blah blah blah
废话+关于Penny无望的幻想+废话
Okay then
那好吧
You know you can grow the ingredients for soup
你知道 汤的配料是可以种植的