小谢尔顿-S04E08_小谢尔顿

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小谢尔顿-S07E01

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Nobody else is stronger than I am

世上没人比我强壮

Yesterday I moved a mountain

昨天我移了一座山

I bet I could be your hero

我相信我能当你的英雄

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

Previously on Young Sheldon

《少年谢尔顿》前情提要

Hello Mrs Cooper I just wanted to let you know

你好库珀太太我只是想告诉你

with Dr Sturgis away

虽然斯特吉斯博士不在了

I'll be available should Sheldon need anything

但是以后我也会帮忙照看谢尔顿

Now I'm not terribly experienced around children

我对照顾小孩的经验不算太多想请问一下

If he needs to use the restroom

如果他想上厕所

I don't have to go in with him do I

我不需要陪他进去吧

I don't need you to babysit me

我不需要你来当我的保姆

I'm perfectly self reliant

我完全可以自力更生

Then it's good I kept the receipt

幸好我还留着这个

for this bottle of bubbles shaped like a bear

熊形状吹泡泡瓶的收据

Welcome to the world of philosophy

欢迎来到哲学的世界

I'm going to teach you

我要教导你们

that you don't even know what you think you know

其实你们以为自己懂的事物你们并非真的懂

Oh boy

天啊

I'm not going to school Why not

-我不去学校 -为什么

Because I don't know what's real

因为我不知道什么才是真的

Nothing matters

什么都不重要了

George

乔治

All right what's the problem here

好啦所以是有什么问题

I don't know what's real

我不知道何为真何为假

That's a fun thing to think about on the way to school

这个有趣的问题你可以在上学的路上思考

Get up and get dressed

赶紧起床换衣服

Maybe I'm already dressed

也许我已经穿好了

Maybe I'm wearing a zoot suit and spats

也许我正穿着佐特西装与靴套

That's a shoe covering that's short for "Spatterdasher "

这是套在靴子上的东西全名是"高筒靴鞋套"

Or is it

但真是这样吗

There's no way to know

我们无从得知

Here's what I know I don't have time for this nonsense

我只知道我没时间听你在这里胡说八道

What is time

何谓时间

What is sense

何谓"道"

What is "is"

何谓"是"

Sheldon I mean it

谢尔顿我是说真的

I remember when things meant things

曾经理即是理

All right I'm gonna count to three One

好我现在数到三一

Believing in numbers that takes me back

相信数字的意义令我想起当年啊

Two To be or not to be

-二 -生存还是死去

Shakespeare was onto something

莎士比亚颇有见地啊

It's your last chance

这是你最后的机会了

Have you ever wondered if you're the tongue

你可曾想过或许你只是

of a multidimensional being trying to taste something

某个多维生物的舌头正在试着品味

you can never even understand

自身永远无法理解的事物呢

I have

我想过

I talked to him

我去跟他说过了

Where is your mother

你妈呢

She had to leave for work

她上班必须得出门了

I have to work too

我也得上班啊

You also get to take me to school

你还得到了载我去上学的任务

What am I supposed to do about your brother

那我该拿你弟弟怎么办

Call me old fashioned

可能我比较老派吧

but I say spank him

我觉得你打他屁股就行了

Your mom won't let me

你妈不让我打呀

Okay I'm here

行了老娘驾到

What's up

有何事相求

Sheldon won't get out of bed and I'm gonna be late for work

谢尔顿不愿意下床我上班快迟到

He's gonna be late for school

他上学也要迟到了

So you want me to get him up and drive him

所以你是要我把他挖起来并载去学校吗

Yeah

是的

I like it better when I just come eat your food and leave

我比较喜欢来你家蹭吃蹭喝完就走的时候

Hey Moon Pie

小饼饼

What's going on here

你怎么啦

That's an excellent question

这是个好问题

Too bad there's no answer

可惜这个问题没有答案

Well you need to get out of bed

你必须起床了

I don't need to do anything

我不需要做任何事

Okay I'm gonna count to three

行我给你数到三

Dad already counted to three

爸爸已经数过了

Did he try the Texas thing

那他试过德州那招吗

没有

In that case

那来吧

look at you lyin' there

看看你躺在那里的窝囊样

When a Texan gets knocked off a horse

当一个德州好汉摔落马时

he gets right back on

他会立刻重新骑上马

That is the second most important thing about bein' a Texan

这可是德州人第二重要的大事

right after thinkin' you're better than everybody else

而第一重要的就是相信自己高全世界一等

Maybe the horse gets back on the Texan

也许是马又重新驮上了德州人呢

Who's to say

谁能知晓

I don't know what that means

我不知道这是什么意思

That's because you can't know anything

因为人没有办法知道任何东西

If you need to stare at the ceiling

如果你也想要盯着天花板

and contemplate the futility of existence

思索存在的徒劳

Missy's bed is available

米希的床现在能让你躺

Amazing

牛逼

What is

什么

I've been using this same pen for seven months

我连续用着同一支笔七个月了

and it's still going

它还屹立不倒

That's your bar for amazing

你牛逼的标准这么低吗

Yeah

对啊

Sad

真可怜

It's the same pen

是同一只笔耶

It is too early in the morning for you

你这也太早就开始发癫了吧

Hello

你好

Yeah I'll be down in a bit

好的我马上过去

Where ya headed

你要去哪

Principal's office

校长办公室

Ooh you're in trouble

有人惹麻烦啦

You're a child

你好幼稚

I'd rather be a child than in trouble

我宁愿幼稚也不要惹麻烦

Shelly

谢利

Dr Sturgis is on the line for you

斯特吉斯博士在电话上

Maybe he is maybe he isn't

或许在或许不在

but very well

不过行吧

Hello ‭ Hi Sheldon

-你好 -你好啊谢尔顿

I hear you're going through some sort of existential crisis

我听说你在面临一些存在感危机

I suppose so

或许吧

I just don't know if we can tell what's real or not

但我们如何能说什么是真的什么不是呢

And if nothing's real

所以如果什么都不是真的

I don't know what to think or if I'm even thinking at all

我不知道该想什么或我到底有没有在思考了

I went through something similar once

我也曾经历过类似的情况

Really What happened

真的吗是怎么回事

I was trekking through the Amazon

我当年在亚马逊森林里跋山蹚水时

and I saw two frogs

见到了两只青蛙

one hallucinogenic

其中一只的体液有致幻效果

and the other not

而另一只没有

I tried to lick the normal one

我本来要去舔普通的那只

and by mistake

没想到舔错了

I licked the hallucinogenic one

舔到了会致幻的那只

It really rocked my world

我的世界瞬间被颠覆了

Why would you lick either of them

你为什么会想舔任何一只青蛙呢

I'm not sure Probably low blood sugar

不确定可能我当时血糖低晕了吧

But the point is

但我要说的重点是

I also lost track of reality

我也失去了对真实的掌握

How did you handle it

那你是怎么面对的

I saw a jaguar

我遇到了一只美洲豹

and I realized I didn't care if it was real or not

结果发现我根本不在乎它是真是假

I just hauled my tushy out of there

我反正就赶紧溜之大吉

I appreciate the call

谢谢你的电话

I'm giving you back to my meemaw now

我要把电话转交给姥姥了

Bye

再见

Hey John

你好啊约翰

any luck

成功了吗

Not unless you have access to a jaguar

除非你有办法能弄来一只美洲豹

I don't think I do

我没这个本事

Really any jungle cat will do

真的吗任何一种丛林里的猫科都行啊

Hey Tom

我来了汤姆

George

乔治

Sheldon's not here anymore

谢尔顿不在这里上学以后

Thought it'd be a while before I got called back

我还以为得过好些日子

into the principal's office

才会再被叫来校长办公室

How's he doing I miss that kid

他最近如何挺想念那孩子

He took a philosophy class and won't get out of bed

他上完一堂哲学课后就不愿意下床

'cause he doesn't know what's real anymore

因为他不知道世间万物的真假了

Anyway uh

言归正传吧

we need to talk about Georgie

我们得谈谈小乔治的事

Should've seen that coming

我早该猜到了

What's wrong ‭Well he's been cutting classes

-他出什么事了 -他翘了很多课

Already

这就开始翘了吗

Semester's barely started

学期才刚开始啊

He's a go getter

他是个行动力很强的孩子

I'll talk to him ‭ Thanks

-我再去找他谈谈 -谢谢

How's the team looking this year George

球队今年情况如何啊乔治

‭We just had one difficult conversation Tom

汤姆我们刚刚才聊完一件惨事

Let's not have another

先别那么快再聊另一件吧

Smart

好主意

While my meemaw wasn't able to acquire a jungle cat

虽然我姥姥没有弄来丛林猫科的方式

the idea of tormenting a child did tickle her Texan fancy

但刑求小孩这件事很对她的胃口

Sheldon

谢尔顿

I have someone else who wants to talk to you

想跟你聊聊的可不止教授

What are you doing with that filthy thing

你拿着这恶心的生物想做什么

Why do you care

你管这个干嘛

If nothing is real

反正什么都是假的

then neither is the chicken

这只鸡也是假的

Oh Good

很好

We're standing now That's progress

现在能站起来了终于有点进步

Get her out of here

把它从这里弄出去

Well I would but

我可以啊但是...

apparently I can't know what "here" Is

我怎么能知道"这里"是哪里呢

So maybe I could just

所以或许我该...

set her on your bed

直接把它放你床上

Okay Okay

好了好了

I'll get dressed

我这就换衣服

Make it snappy

麻利点

This still doesn't solve my existential crisis

但这并不能解决我的存在感危机

Say what You want to hold her

你说什么你想抱它吗

不想

Less talk

废话少点

More pants

换装快点

What's your first class

你第一堂课是什么时候

Solid State Physics at 11 30

11点半有固体物理学课

We'll make it just in time

我们来得及赶上

Although And before you say

-虽然... -在你说

"Does time even exist " It does

"时间真的存在吗"之前它存在

So stop wasting mine

所以别再浪费我的时间了

What's this philosophy teacher's name

这个哲学老师叫什么名字

Professor Ericson Why

-埃里克森教授 -怎么了

I might pop in and say hello

我或许会过去跟她打个招呼

Be careful

小心一点

She may make you question your most deeply held values

她可能会让你开始质疑自己最珍视的价值观

I'm a stubborn old crank

我是个顽固的暴躁老太婆

I'll do just fine

我能扛得住

I'm a stubborn young crank and it didn't help me

我是个顽固的暴躁小年轻也是没用啊

You wanted to see me

你找我吗

Sit down

坐下

Is this gonna take long I need to get to class

要说很久吗我还有课

From what I hear you don't care about that

是吗我可听说你不在意上课

Now sit

给老子坐下

What the hell you doin'

你搞什么鬼呢

I cut a class Who cares

我就翘了堂课谁在乎啊

It was more than one and I care

我在意而且你可不止翘了一堂课

You start flunking out you're gonna get kicked off the team

你一旦开始挂科你会被踢出球队的

Fine

那就踢吧

Now you don't care about football

你现在也不在乎打球了吗

Not really

不太在乎

I don't know what's going on with you

我不知道你是在闹哪样

but you better get your head out of your ass

但你脑子里的屎倒一倒吧

Football's a waste of time

打球纯属浪费时间

I have a job I could be at

那时间我拿去工作不是更好吗

You made a commitment to the team and you're gonna honor it

你进队时你就有了责任有责任你就该担起它

We done

说完没

Just get back to class

给我滚回去上课

And I better see you at practice

球队练习时最好别让我找不到你

Well I don't know if I can find it with my head up my ass

我脑子里都装屎了不知道还找不找得到路

那么

according to de Broglie lambda equals "h" divided by "m" times what

德布罗意认为 λ等于h除以m乘以什么

Sheldon

谢尔顿

Is it velocity

是速度v吗

Yes Now

没错接下来...

Or is it a velociraptor

还是迅猛龙

I'm sorry

你说什么

Perhaps lambda equals "h" divided by "m" times a velociraptor

说不定λ等于h除以m乘以迅猛龙

Or a velveteen rabbit

或是乘以绒毛兔

Ooh or Velveeta

又或是味维他芝士

That's the cheese my mom puts on broccoli

我妈想高级一把时

when she's being fancy

就会用这种芝士烹饪西兰花

Is this from your philosophy class

你这套从哪学来的哲学课

or perhaps that Ren & Stumpy I've heard about

还是我听说过的那个卡通《雷恩和矮墩》

Philosophy

哲学课

Mr Cooper do you really believe

库珀先生你真认为

that de Broglie's equation contains Velveeta cheese

德布罗意的等式包含味维他芝士

I don't know Maybe he was just trying to be fancy

我不知道没准他也只是想高级一把呢

Hello

你好

Can I help you

请问有什么事

Hi I'm Connie Tucker

我是康妮·塔克

I'm Sheldon Cooper's grandmother

我是谢尔顿·库珀的姥姥

Oh Nice to meet you

很高兴认识你

He is a remarkable young man

他是个非常优秀的年轻人

Yes he is He's also a very impressionable young man

是啊他也是个极易受影响的年轻人

Kind of like a lump of clay with a bow tie

可以说是块戴领结的黏土任人搓圆按扁

All I did was teach him about epistemology

我不过是教了他认识论

Whatever it is you're teaching him

不管你教了他什么

it has made him question everything

都导致了他质疑世间万物

That's the goal

这就是我的目的啊

Lady I had to threaten him with a chicken

女士我为了逼他换裤子出门

so he'd put his pants on

甚至动用到鸡来威胁他

I don't know what's gotten into that kid

我不知道那孩子是怎么了

He's allowed to not want to play football

他有权不想打橄榄球啊

Can you for once in your life take my side Wayne

你就不能支持我一次吗韦恩

Not my fault you're never right

你每次都错也不能怪我啊

So you think it's okay he just quits

他就这样轻易放弃你觉得没问题

He doesn't get that much playing time

他上场时间又不多

Well in my family we don't quit

我们家的人从不放弃

Oh I don't know You quit my book club pretty quick

我可不确定你退出我读书会就挺快的

I'm talking about football

我在说橄榄球啦

Why is it so important to you that he play

他打球为什么对你那么重要

Are you sure you're a coach

你真是教练吗

Team sports provides confidence leadership discipline

团队运动能给人自信领导能力纪律性

So does holding down a job

保住一份工作也一样

which he seems to shine at

那方面他貌似表现很出色

Let's just eat in silence

我们还是安静吃饭吧

Fine

行

I still think you should have read The Color Purple

我还是觉得你该看《紫颜色》那本书的

We were bawling

我们都看哭了

Although tasty a brick of cheese is not a number

虽然芝士块很美味但它不是数字

Why are we still talking about this

我们为什么还在聊这个

Maybe we're not talking at all

也许我们根本没在说话

Okay that's enough for today

今天的课就上到这里

Not your best lecture

不是你最精彩的一课

It's fairly normal for first time

第一次接触哲学的学生

philosophy students to have their worldviews shaken

感到世界观被动摇很正常

Do they snap out of it

他们会摆脱这状态吗

Well you hope

希望会啦

Professor Ericson I insist

埃里克森教授我坚持...

Hello Connie What a pleasant surprise

你好康妮见到你真惊喜

I'm sorry you're about to see me speak harshly to my colleague

很抱歉你即将看到我对同事疾言厉色

Have at it Professor Ericson

-尽情骂吧 -埃里克森教授

I insist that you speak to this young man

我坚持要你和这位年轻人谈谈

and explain to him that reality is real

给他解释清楚现实是真实存在的

and it's possible to know things as fact

完全有可能知道某些事是事实

The class is called "Introduction to Philosophy "

这门课叫"哲学入门"

That's what I did

我只是带他们入门而已

Well un introduce him

那就带他"出门"

Yes he's at this school 'cause of his brilliant scientific mind

没错他来我校是因为他有绝佳的科学头脑

and he spent my last class talking about processed cheese

可我上一节课他一直在聊加工芝士

Sheldon is that true

谢尔顿这是真的吗

Nothing's true

没有什么是真的

You see what you've done You broke him

你看到你干的好事了吗你把他毁了

How come you didn't want to get out of bed this morning

你今早为什么不想起床

If I can't know what's real what's the point

如果我无法知道什么是真实的还有什么意义

You have the right words

你的话没错

You're just saying them wrong

你只是语气错了

It's not "What's the point "

不是万念俱灰的"还有什么意义"

It's "What's the point "

而是求知提问 "这个的意义是什么呢"

I don't understand

我不明白

Asking these questions is exciting

提出这些问题让人激动兴奋

It's what gets me out of bed

这是我起床的动力

That's interesting

有意思

Richard Feynman did say

理查德·费曼的确说过

the greatest joy in life is the pleasure of finding things out

人生最大的乐趣莫过于找到问题的答案

Feynman he's the physics guy right

费曼是那个搞物理的对吧

Yes And your perfume is beguiling

对还有你的香水令人沉醉

It's all making sense to me now

仿佛醍醐灌顶

Thank you

谢谢你

I am happy to help

我很乐意帮忙

Dr Linkletter I'm dropping your class

林克莱特博士我要退选你的课

and switching my major to philosophy

把我的专业改成哲学

Uh what

什么

It's funny This morning I couldn't get out of bed

真奇妙今早我还起不了床

and now I stand before a whole new exciting field of study

现在却有一个全新的研究领域等我去踏足好激动

Well maybe instead of making this big switch

或许你不该轻易转专业

you could study both

你可以两门课一起修啊

You could be physics philosophy guy

当个物理哲学家之类的

You sound like a logical positivist

你听起来是个逻辑实证论者

That's a branch of philosophy that maintains

这个哲学分支主张

the best way to philosophize is through science

进行哲学探讨的最佳方式是通过科学

Well there you go Do that

这就对了就这么做吧

It may be too early to specialize

现在就决定专攻的哲学学派有点太早

I've only been a philosopher for 15 minutes

毕竟我才刚当哲学家15分钟左右

Did you notice Dr Linkletter didn't look too thrilled

你有没注意到林克莱特博士不太开心

about you leaving science

因为你要离开科学界

He never looks thrilled about anything

他对任何事都是摆出这副不开心脸

I think that's just his face

他应该只是长成那样啦

That's the face

就是你脸上这个表情

Why the hell weren't you at practice

你为什么没去训练

Can't talk right now I'm working

现在没空聊我在上班

Well you're gonna talk about it

你必须跟老子说清楚

What do you want from me

你到底想要我怎么样

I don't want to play football I want to work

我不想打橄榄球我想上班

You have your whole life to hold down a job

你还有一辈子时间去干一份工作

Hey I like my job

我喜欢我的工作

It's not my problem you hate yours

而你讨厌你的与我无关

Do whatever you want

随你便吧

To figure out which school of philosophy suited me best

为了确定哪个哲学学派最适合我

I decided to sample each one

我决定每个都尝试一下

The same way I determined my favorite flavor of oatmeal

我也是用这办法决定我最喜欢的燕麦粥口味的

plain

我最爱的是原味啦

What are you doing

你在干嘛

I'm practicing the philosophy of cynicism

我在遵循犬儒哲学

the ancient Greek view

古希腊人认为

that the rules of society should be ignored

人应该无视社会规则

If you're gonna break rules you can do better than that

你要是想打破规矩你得做更出格一点

How

怎么做

Renaissance humanism is

文艺复兴时期的人文主义

finding meaning in the human form through art

就是通过艺术找到人体形态的意义

Can I move ‭ No

-我能动吗 -不能

But my butt itches

但我屁屁很痒

Scratch it on your own time

等我画完你再抠

Nihilists believe that there's no point to anything

虚无主义者认为任何事物的存在都没有意义

because it all ends in nothingness

因为一切都以虚无告终

Mind if I put on MTV

我可以看MTV台吗

Doesn't matter We're all gonna die anyway

无所谓反正我们都会死

Deep thought dingus

发人深思啊傻子

Traditionalism is the philosophy

传统主义这门学说

that the best way of life is a return to the past

认为最好的生活方式是回到过去

What are you doing

你在干什么

Making my own butter like in olden times

像古人一样自制黄油

That's stupid

蠢毙了

My arms are still sore

我手臂到现在还酸着呢

Altruism is the belief that we should live

利他主义恪守的原则是

only by bringing happiness to others

我们活着只为给他人带来快乐

These are for you

这些是给你的

Thanks

谢了

What the hell

搞毛啊

Egoism is the belief

利己主义则认为

that we should live only by bringing happiness to ourselves

我们活着只为给自己带来快乐

Mmm These are pretty good

真好吃

Transcendentalists were

先验论者

philosophers who believed that our deepest connection

这类哲学家相信和我们联系最深的

is with nature

是自然

I'm beautiful

我好美哦

And then Georgie accuses me of hating my job

然后乔治竟敢说我讨厌我的工作

Is this where I thought I'd end up No

我想过我会沦落到干这个吗当然没有

Is this where you thought you'd end up

你想过你会沦落到干这个吗

I thought I'd be working at my father's funeral home

我本以为我会在我爸的殡仪馆工作

sewing people's eyes shut

帮死人把眼睛缝起来

My life turned out great

我的人生其实变得很美妙

Well good for you

恭喜你啊

The worst part is I think Georgie's right

最糟心的是小乔治好像说对了

You're not happy at work

你工作得不开心吗

I can see if my dad's hiring

我可以问问我爸请不请人

How are your sewing skills

你缝纫技术怎么样

It's not work

不是工作

Honestly I don't know if I'm happy anywhere

说实话我不知道我有没有开心的时候

Ugh When I asked y'all to hang for a drink

我邀请你们一起喝酒时

I didn't know you were gonna be such a bummer

可没料到你会这么扫兴

Geez Louise

老天啊

Dr Linkletter ‭ Sheldon

-林克莱特博士 -谢尔顿

Good to see you

见到你很高兴

Come on in I don't suppose you're here to discuss physics are you

快进来你应该不是来讨论物理的吧

As a matter of fact I am

其实我是

Excellent

太好了

I'm here to drop your class

我是来退课的

I just need you to sign this

我需要你在这签名

Have a seat

坐下

Sheldon I don't know if you've thought this through

谢尔顿我不知道你有没有考虑清楚

but you're here on a physics scholarship

但你在这念书靠的是物理奖学金

and swicthing to philosophy may not be well received

转去哲学专业校方未必能接受

Ordinarily I'd be concerned but I'm currently embracing hedonism

通常我会担心但我目前正信奉享乐主义

Sheldon I've been made responsible for you

谢尔顿我答应过会对你负责

and so far it's not going very well

到目前为止都不太顺利

You were admitted to this university for your scientific acumen

你被这所大学录取是因为你有科学天赋

And chaning majors could have serious repercussions

改专业可能会带来严重影响

Son please try to understand

孩子请你试着理解一下

If you abandon physics for philosophy

如果你放弃物理学转投哲学

you're gonna be missing out on the opportunity

你会错失做出

to be part of something great Possibly

伟大贡献的机会很有可能...

As Dr Linkletter prattled on

林克莱特博士絮叨的时候

I couldn't help but notice the beauty of that ephemeral bubble

我不禁注意到那个转瞬即逝的泡泡有多美

I wondered if perhaps we're all just bubbles

不知道我们是否都只是泡泡

being buffeted through life on a stream of currents

被超出我们理解的连串气流

beyond our understanding

推波助澜走过一生

Look at it

看啊

The local minimization achieves a global maximization

从微小之处造就宏图大略

and it's nearly perfect

近乎完美

I wondered if this was the key

这是否就是宇宙中

to the smoothness of matter in the universe

物质平衡稳定的关键

The cosmic web of stars and galaxies could hold it together

宇宙的群星和星系网能将一切联系在一起

like the web of polymers in soap

就像肥皂里的聚合物网

This could be a whole new area of research

这也许是个全新的研究领域

Changing majors would be a huge mistake

改专业会是个天大的错误

but if this is what you really want

但如果这是你想要的

here you go

如你所愿

Sheldon What

-谢尔顿 -怎么了

Here you go

给你

Good luck with philosophy

祝你研究哲学好运

Oh I'm back on science now I have work to do

我又回归科学了我要去做研究了