Nobody else is stronger than I am
世上没人比我强壮
Yesterday I moved a mountain
昨天我移了一座山
I bet I could be your hero
我相信我能当你的英雄
I am a mighty little man
我是个了不起的小家伙
I am a mighty little man
我是个了不起的小家伙
Previously on Young Sheldon...
《少年谢尔顿》前情提要
Hello Mrs. Cooper. I just wanted to let you know
你好 库珀太太 我只是想告诉你
with Dr. Sturgis away
虽然斯特吉斯博士不在了
I'll be available should Sheldon need anything.
但是以后我也会帮忙照看谢尔顿
Now I'm not terribly experienced around children.
我对照顾小孩的经验不算太多 想请问一下
If he needs to use the restroom
如果他想上厕所
I don't have to go in with him do I
我不需要陪他进去吧
I don't need you to babysit me.
我不需要你来当我的保姆
I'm perfectly self reliant.
我完全可以自力更生
Then it's good I kept the receipt
幸好我还留着这个
for this bottle of bubbles shaped like a bear.
熊形状吹泡泡瓶的收据
Welcome to the world of philosophy.
欢迎来到哲学的世界
I'm going to teach you
我要教导你们
that you don't even know what you think you know.
其实你们以为自己懂的事物 你们并非真的懂
Oh boy.
天啊
I'm not going to school. Why not
-我不去学校 -为什么
Because I don't know what's real.
因为我不知道什么才是真的
Nothing matters.
什么都不重要了
George
乔治
All right what's the problem here
好啦 所以是有什么问题
I don't know what's real.
我不知道何为真何为假
That's a fun thing to think about on the way to school.
这个有趣的问题你可以在上学的路上思考
Get up and get dressed.
赶紧起床换衣服
Maybe I'm already dressed.
也许我已经穿好了
Maybe I'm wearing a zoot suit and spats.
也许我正穿着佐特西装与靴套
That's a shoe covering that's short for "Spatterdasher."
这是套在靴子上的东西 全名是"高筒靴鞋套"
Or is it
但真是这样吗
There's no way to know.
我们无从得知
Here's what I know I don't have time for this nonsense.
我只知道我没时间听你在这里胡说八道
What is time
何谓时间
What is sense
何谓"道"
What is "is"
何谓"是"
Sheldon I mean it.
谢尔顿 我是说真的
I remember when things meant things.
曾经理即是理
All right I'm gonna count to three. One...
好 我现在数到三 一
Believing in numbers that takes me back.
相信数字的意义 令我想起当年啊
Two... To be or not to be.
-二 -生存还是死去
Shakespeare was onto something.
莎士比亚颇有见地啊
It's your last chance.
这是你最后的机会了
Have you ever wondered if you're the tongue
你可曾想过 或许你只是
of a multidimensional being trying to taste something
某个多维生物的舌头 正在试着品味
you can never even understand
自身永远无法理解的事物呢
I have.
我想过
I talked to him.
我去跟他说过了
Where is your mother
你妈呢
She had to leave for work.
她上班必须得出门了
I have to work too.
我也得上班啊
You also get to take me to school.
你还得到了载我去上学的任务
What am I supposed to do about your brother
那我该拿你弟弟怎么办
Call me old fashioned
可能我比较老派吧
but I say spank him.
我觉得你打他屁股就行了
Your mom won't let me.
你妈不让我打呀
Okay I'm here.
行了 老娘驾到
What's up
有何事相求
Sheldon won't get out of bed and I'm gonna be late for work.
谢尔顿不愿意下床 我上班快迟到
He's gonna be late for school.
他上学也要迟到了
So you want me to get him up and drive him
所以你是要我把他挖起来并载去学校吗
Yeah.
是的
I like it better when I just come eat your food and leave.
我比较喜欢来你家蹭吃蹭喝完就走的时候
Hey Moon Pie.
小饼饼
What's going on here
你怎么啦
That's an excellent question.
这是个好问题
Too bad there's no answer.
可惜这个问题没有答案
Well you need to get out of bed.
你必须起床了
I don't need to do anything.
我不需要做任何事
Okay I'm gonna count to three.
行 我给你数到三
Dad already counted to three.
爸爸已经数过了
Did he try the Texas thing
那他试过德州那招吗
No.
没有
In that case
那来吧
look at you lyin' there.
看看你躺在那里的窝囊样
When a Texan gets knocked off a horse
当一个德州好汉摔落马时
he gets right back on.
他会立刻重新骑上马
That is the second most important thing about bein' a Texan
这可是德州人第二重要的大事
right after thinkin' you're better than everybody else.
而第一重要的 就是相信自己高全世界一等
Maybe the horse gets back on the Texan.
也许是马又重新驮上了德州人呢
Who's to say
谁能知晓
I don't know what that means.
我不知道这是什么意思
That's because you can't know anything.
因为人没有办法知道任何东西
If you need to stare at the ceiling
如果你也想要盯着天花板
and contemplate the futility of existence
思索存在的徒劳
Missy's bed is available.
米希的床现在能让你躺
Amazing.
牛逼
What is
什么
I've been using this same pen for seven months
我连续用着同一支笔七个月了
and it's still going.
它还屹立不倒
That's your bar for amazing
你牛逼的标准这么低吗
Yeah.
对啊
Sad.
真可怜
It's the same pen.
是同一只笔耶
It is too early in the morning for you.
你这也太早就开始发癫了吧
Hello.
你好
Yeah. I'll be down in a bit.
好的 我马上过去
Where ya headed
你要去哪
Principal's office.
校长办公室
Ooh you're in trouble...
有人惹麻烦啦
You're a child.
你好幼稚
I'd rather be a child than in trouble.
我宁愿幼稚也不要惹麻烦
Shelly
谢利
Dr. Sturgis is on the line for you.
斯特吉斯博士在电话上
Maybe he is maybe he isn't
或许在 或许不在
but very well.
不过行吧
Hello Hi Sheldon.
-你好 -你好啊 谢尔顿
I hear you're going through some sort of existential crisis.
我听说你在面临一些存在感危机
I suppose so.
或许吧
I just don't know if we can tell what's real or not.
但我们如何能说什么是真的什么不是呢
And if nothing's real
所以如果什么都不是真的
I don't know what to think or if I'm even thinking at all.
我不知道该想什么 或我到底有没有在思考了
I went through something similar once.
我也曾经历过类似的情况
Really What happened
真的吗 是怎么回事
I was trekking through the Amazon
我当年在亚马逊森林里跋山蹚水时
and I saw two frogs
见到了两只青蛙
one hallucinogenic
其中一只的体液有致幻效果
and the other not.
而另一只没有
I tried to lick the normal one
我本来要去舔普通的那只
and by mistake
没想到舔错了
I licked the hallucinogenic one.
舔到了会致幻的那只
It really rocked my world.
我的世界瞬间被颠覆了
Why would you lick either of them
你为什么会想舔任何一只青蛙呢
I'm not sure. Probably low blood sugar.
不确定 可能我当时血糖低 晕了吧
But the point is
但我要说的重点是
I also lost track of reality.
我也失去了对真实的掌握
How did you handle it
那你是怎么面对的
I saw a jaguar
我遇到了一只美洲豹
and I realized I didn't care if it was real or not.
结果发现我根本不在乎它是真是假
I just hauled my tushy out of there.
我反正就赶紧溜之大吉
I appreciate the call.
谢谢你的电话
I'm giving you back to my meemaw now.
我要把电话转交给姥姥了
Bye
再见
Hey John
你好啊 约翰
any luck
成功了吗
Not unless you have access to a jaguar.
除非你有办法能弄来一只美洲豹
I don't think I do.
我没这个本事
Really any jungle cat will do.
真的吗 任何一种丛林里的猫科都行啊
Hey Tom.
我来了 汤姆
George.
乔治
Sheldon's not here anymore.
谢尔顿不在这里上学以后
Thought it'd be a while before I got called back
我还以为得过好些日子
into the principal's office.
才会再被叫来校长办公室
How's he doing I miss that kid.
他最近如何 挺想念那孩子
He took a philosophy class and won't get out of bed
他上完一堂哲学课后就不愿意下床
'cause he doesn't know what's real anymore.
因为他不知道世间万物的真假了
Anyway uh
言归正传吧
we need to talk about Georgie.
我们得谈谈小乔治的事
Should've seen that coming.
我早该猜到了
What's wrong ‭Well he's been cutting classes.
-他出什么事了 -他翘了很多课
Already
这就开始翘了吗
Semester's barely started.
学期才刚开始啊
He's a go getter.
他是个行动力很强的孩子
I'll talk to him. Thanks.
-我再去找他谈谈 -谢谢
How's the team looking this year George
球队今年情况如何啊 乔治
‭We just had one difficult conversation Tom.
汤姆 我们刚刚才聊完一件惨事
Let's not have another.
先别那么快再聊另一件吧
Smart.
好主意
While my meemaw wasn't able to acquire a jungle cat
虽然我姥姥没有弄来丛林猫科的方式
the idea of tormenting a child did tickle her Texan fancy.
但刑求小孩这件事很对她的胃口
Sheldon.
谢尔顿
I have someone else who wants to talk to you.
想跟你聊聊的可不止教授
What are you doing with that filthy thing
你拿着这恶心的生物想做什么
Why do you care
你管这个干嘛
If nothing is real
反正什么都是假的
then neither is the chicken.
这只鸡也是假的
Oh. Good.
很好
We're standing now. That's progress.
现在能站起来了 终于有点进步
Get her out of here.
把它从这里弄出去
Well I would but...
我可以啊 但是...
apparently I can't know what "here" Is.
我怎么能知道"这里"是哪里呢
So maybe I could just...
所以或许我该...
set her on your bed.
直接把它放你床上
Okay Okay.
好了好了
I'll get dressed.
我这就换衣服
Make it snappy.
麻利点
This still doesn't solve my existential crisis.
但这并不能解决我的存在感危机
Say what You want to hold her
你说什么 你想抱它吗
No.
不想
Less talk.
废话少点
More pants.
换装快点
What's your first class
你第一堂课是什么时候
Solid State Physics at 11 30.
11点半有固体物理学课
We'll make it just in time.
我们来得及赶上
Although ... And before you say
-虽然... -在你说
"Does time even exist " It does.
"时间真的存在吗"之前 它存在
So stop wasting mine.
所以别再浪费我的时间了
What's this philosophy teacher's name
这个哲学老师叫什么名字
Professor Ericson. Why
-埃里克森教授 -怎么了
I might pop in and say hello.
我或许会过去跟她打个招呼
Be careful.
小心一点
She may make you question your most deeply held values.
她可能会让你开始质疑自己最珍视的价值观
I'm a stubborn old crank.
我是个顽固的暴躁老太婆
I'll do just fine.
我能扛得住
I'm a stubborn young crank and it didn't help me.
我是个顽固的暴躁小年轻 也是没用啊
You wanted to see me
你找我吗
Sit down.
坐下
Is this gonna take long I need to get to class.
要说很久吗 我还有课
From what I hear you don't care about that.
是吗 我可听说你不在意上课
Now sit.
给老子坐下
What the hell you doin'
你搞什么鬼呢
I cut a class. Who cares
我就翘了堂课 谁在乎啊
It was more than one and I care.
我在意 而且你可不止翘了一堂课
You start flunking out you're gonna get kicked off the team.
你一旦开始挂科 你会被踢出球队的
Fine.
那就踢吧
Now you don't care about football
你现在也不在乎打球了吗
Not really.
不太在乎
I don't know what's going on with you
我不知道你是在闹哪样
but you better get your head out of your ass.
但你脑子里的屎倒一倒吧
Football's a waste of time.
打球纯属浪费时间
I have a job I could be at.
那时间我拿去工作不是更好吗
You made a commitment to the team and you're gonna honor it.
你进队时你就有了责任 有责任你就该担起它
We done
说完没
Just get back to class.
给我滚回去上课
And I better see you at practice.
球队练习时最好别让我找不到你
Well I don't know if I can find it with my head up my ass.
我脑子里都装屎了 不知道还找不找得到路
So
那么
according to de Broglie lambda equals "h" divided by "m" times what
德布罗意认为 λ等于h除以m乘以什么
Sheldon.
谢尔顿
Is it velocity
是速度v吗
Yes. Now...
没错 接下来...
Or is it a velociraptor
还是迅猛龙
I'm sorry
你说什么
Perhaps lambda equals "h" divided by "m" times a velociraptor.
说不定λ等于h除以m乘以迅猛龙
Or a velveteen rabbit.
或是乘以绒毛兔
Ooh or Velveeta.
又或是味维他芝士
That's the cheese my mom puts on broccoli
我妈想高级一把时
when she's being fancy.
就会用这种芝士烹饪西兰花
Is this from your philosophy class
你这套从哪学来的 哲学课
or perhaps that Ren & Stumpy I've heard about
还是我听说过的那个卡通《雷恩和矮墩》
Philosophy.
哲学课
Mr. Cooper do you really believe
库珀先生 你真认为
that de Broglie's equation contains Velveeta cheese
德布罗意的等式包含味维他芝士
I don't know. Maybe he was just trying to be fancy.
我不知道 没准他也只是想高级一把呢
Hello.
你好
Can I help you
请问有什么事
Hi. I'm Connie Tucker.
我是康妮·塔克
I'm Sheldon Cooper's grandmother.
我是谢尔顿·库珀的姥姥
Oh. Nice to meet you.
很高兴认识你
He is a remarkable young man.
他是个非常优秀的年轻人
Yes he is. He's also a very impressionable young man.
是啊 他也是个极易受影响的年轻人
Kind of like a lump of clay with a bow tie.
可以说是块戴领结的黏土 任人搓圆按扁
All I did was teach him about epistemology.
我不过是教了他认识论
Whatever it is you're teaching him
不管你教了他什么
it has made him question everything.
都导致了他质疑世间万物
That's the goal.
这就是我的目的啊
Lady I had to threaten him with a chicken
女士 我为了逼他换裤子出门
so he'd put his pants on.
甚至动用到鸡来威胁他
I don't know what's gotten into that kid.
我不知道那孩子是怎么了
He's allowed to not want to play football.
他有权不想打橄榄球啊
Can you for once in your life take my side Wayne
你就不能支持我一次吗 韦恩
Not my fault you're never right.
你每次都错也不能怪我啊
So you think it's okay he just quits
他就这样轻易放弃 你觉得没问题
He doesn't get that much playing time.
他上场时间又不多
Well in my family we don't quit.
我们家的人从不放弃
Oh I don't know. You quit my book club pretty quick.
我可不确定 你退出我读书会就挺快的
I'm talking about football
我在说橄榄球啦
Why is it so important to you that he play
他打球为什么对你那么重要
Are you sure you're a coach
你真是教练吗
Team sports provides confidence leadership discipline.
团队运动能给人自信 领导能力 纪律性
So does holding down a job
保住一份工作也一样
which he seems to shine at.
那方面他貌似表现很出色
Let's just eat in silence.
我们还是安静吃饭吧
Fine.
I still think you should have read The Color Purple.
我还是觉得你该看《紫颜色》那本书的
We were bawling.
我们都看哭了
Although tasty a brick of cheese is not a number.
虽然芝士块很美味 但它不是数字
Why are we still talking about this
我们为什么还在聊这个
Maybe we're not talking at all.
也许我们根本没在说话
Okay that's enough for today.
今天的课就上到这里
Not your best lecture.
不是你最精彩的一课
It's fairly normal for first time
第一次接触哲学的学生
philosophy students to have their worldviews shaken.
感到世界观被动摇 很正常
Do they snap out of it
他们会摆脱这状态吗
Well you hope.
希望会啦
Professor Ericson I insist...
埃里克森教授 我坚持...
Hello Connie. What a pleasant surprise.
你好 康妮 见到你真惊喜
I'm sorry you're about to see me speak harshly to my colleague.
很抱歉你即将看到我对同事疾言厉色
Have at it. Professor Ericson
-尽情骂吧 -埃里克森教授
I insist that you speak to this young man
我坚持要你和这位年轻人谈谈
and explain to him that reality is real
给他解释清楚 现实是真实存在的
and it's possible to know things as fact.
完全有可能知道某些事是事实
The class is called "Introduction to Philosophy."
这门课叫"哲学入门"
That's what I did.
我只是带他们入门而已
Well un introduce him.
那就带他"出门"
Yes he's at this school 'cause of his brilliant scientific mind
没错 他来我校是因为他有绝佳的科学头脑
and he spent my last class talking about processed cheese.
可我上一节课他一直在聊加工芝士
Sheldon is that true
谢尔顿 这是真的吗
Nothing's true.
没有什么是真的
You see what you've done You broke him.
你看到你干的好事了吗 你把他毁了
How come you didn't want to get out of bed this morning
你今早为什么不想起床
If I can't know what's real what's the point
如果我无法知道什么是真实的 还有什么意义
You have the right words.
你的话没错
You're just saying them wrong.
你只是语气错了
It's not "What's the point "
不是万念俱灰的"还有什么意义"
It's "What's the point "
而是求知提问 "这个的意义是什么呢"
I don't understand.
我不明白
Asking these questions is exciting.
提出这些问题让人激动兴奋
It's what gets me out of bed.
这是我起床的动力
That's interesting.
有意思
Richard Feynman did say
理查德·费曼的确说过
the greatest joy in life is the pleasure of finding things out.
人生最大的乐趣莫过于找到问题的答案
Feynman he's the physics guy right
费曼 是那个搞物理的 对吧
Yes. And your perfume is beguiling.
对 还有 你的香水令人沉醉
It's all making sense to me now.
仿佛醍醐灌顶
Thank you.
谢谢你
I am happy to help.
我很乐意帮忙
Dr. Linkletter I'm dropping your class
林克莱特博士 我要退选你的课
and switching my major to philosophy.
把我的专业改成哲学
Uh what
什么
It's funny. This morning I couldn't get out of bed
真奇妙 今早我还起不了床
and now I stand before a whole new exciting field of study.
现在却有一个全新的研究领域等我去踏足 好激动
Well maybe instead of making this big switch
或许你不该轻易转专业
you could study both.
你可以两门课一起修啊
You could be physics philosophy guy.
当个物理哲学家之类的
You sound like a logical positivist.
你听起来是个逻辑实证论者
That's a branch of philosophy that maintains
这个哲学分支主张
the best way to philosophize is through science.
进行哲学探讨的最佳方式是通过科学
Well there you go. Do that.
这就对了 就这么做吧
It may be too early to specialize.
现在就决定专攻的哲学学派有点太早
I've only been a philosopher for 15 minutes.
毕竟我才刚当哲学家15分钟左右
Did you notice Dr. Linkletter didn't look too thrilled
你有没注意到林克莱特博士不太开心
about you leaving science
因为你要离开科学界
He never looks thrilled about anything.
他对任何事都是摆出这副不开心脸
I think that's just his face.
他应该只是长成那样啦
That's the face.
就是你脸上这个表情
Why the hell weren't you at practice
你为什么没去训练
Can't talk right now. I'm working.
现在没空聊 我在上班
Well you're gonna talk about it.
你必须跟老子说清楚
What do you want from me
你到底想要我怎么样
I don't want to play football. I want to work.
我不想打橄榄球 我想上班
You have your whole life to hold down a job.
你还有一辈子时间去干一份工作
Hey I like my job.
我喜欢我的工作
It's not my problem you hate yours.
而你讨厌你的 与我无关
Do whatever you want.
随你便吧
To figure out which school of philosophy suited me best
为了确定哪个哲学学派最适合我
I decided to sample each one.
我决定每个都尝试一下
The same way I determined my favorite flavor of oatmeal
我也是用这办法决定我最喜欢的燕麦粥口味的
plain.
我最爱的是原味啦
What are you doing
你在干嘛
I'm practicing the philosophy of cynicism
我在遵循犬儒哲学
the ancient Greek view
古希腊人认为
that the rules of society should be ignored.
人应该无视社会规则
If you're gonna break rules you can do better than that.
你要是想打破规矩 你得做更出格一点
How
怎么做
Renaissance humanism is
文艺复兴时期的人文主义
finding meaning in the human form through art.
就是通过艺术找到人体形态的意义
Can I move No.
-我能动吗 -不能
But my butt itches.
但我屁屁很痒
Scratch it on your own time.
等我画完你再抠
Nihilists believe that there's no point to anything
虚无主义者认为任何事物的存在都没有意义
because it all ends in nothingness.
因为一切都以虚无告终
Mind if I put on MTV
我可以看MTV台吗
Doesn't matter. We're all gonna die anyway.
无所谓 反正我们都会死
Deep thought dingus.
发人深思啊 傻子
Traditionalism is the philosophy
传统主义这门学说
that the best way of life is a return to the past.
认为最好的生活方式是回到过去
What are you doing
你在干什么
Making my own butter like in olden times.
像古人一样自制黄油
That's stupid.
蠢毙了
My arms are still sore.
我手臂到现在还酸着呢
Altruism is the belief that we should live
利他主义恪守的原则是
only by bringing happiness to others.
我们活着只为给他人带来快乐
These are for you.
这些是给你的
Thanks.
谢了
What the hell
搞毛啊
Egoism is the belief
利己主义则认为
that we should live only by bringing happiness to ourselves.
我们活着只为给自己带来快乐
Mmm. These are pretty good.
真好吃
Transcendentalists were
先验论者
philosophers who believed that our deepest connection
这类哲学家相信和我们联系最深的
is with nature.
是自然
I'm beautiful.
我好美哦
And then Georgie accuses me of hating my job.
然后乔治竟敢说我讨厌我的工作
Is this where I thought I'd end up No.
我想过我会沦落到干这个吗 当然没有
Is this where you thought you'd end up
你想过你会沦落到干这个吗
I thought I'd be working at my father's funeral home
我本以为我会在我爸的殡仪馆工作
sewing people's eyes shut.
帮死人把眼睛缝起来
My life turned out great.
我的人生其实变得很美妙
Well good for you.
恭喜你啊
The worst part is I think Georgie's right.
最糟心的是 小乔治好像说对了
You're not happy at work
你工作得不开心吗
I can see if my dad's hiring.
我可以问问我爸请不请人
How are your sewing skills
你缝纫技术怎么样
It's not work.
不是工作
Honestly I don't know if I'm happy anywhere.
说实话 我不知道我有没有开心的时候
Ugh. When I asked y'all to hang for a drink
我邀请你们一起喝酒时
I didn't know you were gonna be such a bummer.
可没料到你会这么扫兴
Geez Louise.
老天啊
Dr. Linkletter Sheldon.
-林克莱特博士 -谢尔顿
Good to see you.
见到你很高兴
Come on in. I don't suppose you're here to discuss physics are you
快进来 你应该不是来讨论物理的吧
As a matter of fact I am.
其实我是
Excellent.
太好了
I'm here to drop your class.
我是来退课的
I just need you to sign this.
我需要你在这签名
Have a seat.
坐下
Sheldon I don't know if you've thought this through
谢尔顿 我不知道你有没有考虑清楚
but you're here on a physics scholarship
但你在这念书靠的是物理奖学金
and swicthing to philosophy may not be well received.
转去哲学专业 校方未必能接受
Ordinarily I'd be concerned but I'm currently embracing hedonism.
通常我会担心 但我目前正信奉享乐主义
Sheldon I've been made responsible for you
谢尔顿 我答应过会对你负责
and so far it's not going very well.
到目前为止都不太顺利
You were admitted to this university for your scientific acumen.
你被这所大学录取是因为你有科学天赋
And chaning majors could have serious repercussions.
改专业可能会带来严重影响
Son please try to understand.
孩子 请你试着理解一下
If you abandon physics for philosophy
如果你放弃物理学 转投哲学
you're gonna be missing out on the opportunity
你会错失做出
to be part of something great. Possibly...
伟大贡献的机会 很有可能...
As Dr. Linkletter prattled on
林克莱特博士絮叨的时候
I couldn't help but notice the beauty of that ephemeral bubble.
我不禁注意到那个转瞬即逝的泡泡有多美
I wondered if perhaps we're all just bubbles
不知道我们是否都只是泡泡
being buffeted through life on a stream of currents
被超出我们理解的连串气流
beyond our understanding.
推波助澜走过一生
Look at it.
看啊
The local minimization achieves a global maximization
从微小之处造就宏图大略
and it's nearly perfect.
近乎完美
I wondered if this was the key
这是否就是宇宙中
to the smoothness of matter in the universe.
物质平衡稳定的关键
The cosmic web of stars and galaxies could hold it together
宇宙的群星和星系网能将一切联系在一起
like the web of polymers in soap
就像肥皂里的聚合物网
This could be a whole new area of research.
这也许是个全新的研究领域
Changing majors would be a huge mistake
改专业会是个天大的错误
but if this is what you really want
但如果这是你想要的
here you go.
如你所愿
Sheldon What
-谢尔顿 -怎么了
Here you go.
给你
Good luck with philosophy.
祝你研究哲学好运
Oh I'm back on science now. I have work to do.
我又回归科学了 我要去做研究了
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