小谢尔顿-S06E05_小谢尔顿

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S07

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小谢尔顿-S07E01

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Is it

真的吗

Previously on Young Sheldon

《少年谢尔顿》前情提要

Arrested

被捕

Well they're probably gonna have to pay some fine

他们估计得付一些罚款才能走

and and they're gonna need cash

所以他们会需要现金

What the hell

搞什么

What are you doing here

你怎么会在这

I'm saving you

我来拯救你

Well damn

真不爽

Look you're just a kid okay

你就只是个孩子

You don't understand what's going on here

你不懂这背后有多复杂

I know my mom lost her job and got kicked out of the church

但我知道我妈因为你不嫁我哥

because you won't marry my brother

被踢出了教会丢了工作

Where you going

你去哪

To dance

去跳舞

I didn't think you Baptists did that

我还以为浸礼教徒不跳舞呢

We don't drink neither Ooh

照理说我们也不该喝酒

The kids asleep Yup

-孩子们睡了吗 -睡了

You want to fool around

你想亲热一下吗

Are you messing with me

你是不是在玩我

I'm hoping to

我是希望玩弄你

Well hot diggity dog

我今天中头彩了

Hey

我到了

Oh thanks for coming

感谢你跑这趟

Sounded important What's going on

你电话中语气挺正经所以是什么事

Walk with me Okay

-跟我走一趟 -好

You know that money I owe you

还记得我欠你的钱吗

Oh you got it

你有钱还了吗

Yes and no

对也不对

Uh well which is it

所以到底是怎样

Yes I got it

钱呢我是有

no I'm not giving it to you

但我不打算还你

I want to give you

我想给你的是

a once in a lifetime opportunity

一个毕生难逢的机会

Well I'd prefer my money

我还是比较想要回钱

Do you see any unoccupied machines here

你面前能看到任何空座吗

No Exactly

-没有 -这就对了

We are at capacity It's time to expand

这里已经人满为患是时候扩张了

Where

扩去哪里

The video store right behind that wall

这面墙的另一边的录影带出租店

just lost its lease

租约空出来了

Aw heck I was gonna pick up the new John Candy

靠我还想去租约翰·坎蒂新出的电影呢

Well as my partner in this enterprise

如果你成为我商业王国的伙伴

you can get that new John Candy for free

那电影你可以免费拿到手

So you're gonna buy a video store

所以你是想把出租店买下来啊

Video store in the front

前头挂出租店羊头

video poker in the back

后台卖赌博机狗肉

Where are you getting the poker machine

那你要上哪再去搞赌博机啊

Biloxi Mississippi Oh You didn't learn a lesson

-密西西比州的比洛克西 -你还没学乖啊

when you got arrested at the border Yes

-上次都在边境被抓了 -学到了

I learned not to smuggle contraband

我学到了别跟我的傻逼孙子

with my idiot grandson

一起运违禁品的教训

But there's nothing illegal about buying poker machines

但是买赌博机本身并不违法啊

Till you plug 'em in

但你插上电就违法了

Well sure

是啦

Come on What do you say

怎么样要不要加入

You and me a panel truck Biloxi or bust

你和我一辆货运汽车比洛克西还是比狗怂

So I'm gonna be your partner in an illegal gambling room

所以我将变成你非法赌博房的搭档

Hidden by a legal video store

有完全合法的影带出租店掩护

Connie Gee Come on You said you want to drive around

-康妮这... -拜托是你说想开着房车

in an RV see the country

环游全国欣赏我国大好河山

This is that but exciting

这也差不多啊再加上刺激感

We could go to jail

我们可能得坐牢呢

That's the exciting part

这不就是刺激的部分吗

Nobody else is stronger than I am

世上没人比我强壮

Yesterday I moved a mountain

昨天我移了一座山

I bet I could be your hero

我相信我能当你的英雄

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

年

少

谢尔顿

Hello Mom It's your son Sheldon

你好老妈我是你的儿子谢尔顿

Hello my son Sheldon

你好我的儿子谢尔顿

I have an 8 00 A M class tomorrow and I was wondering

我明天有早8点的课我就在想

if I could spend the night in my dorm That's fine

-我可不可以在我宿舍住一晚 -可以啊

Now before you answer hear me out

在你回答之前先听我说

I have a list of reasons why this is a good idea

我列了一个这为什么是好主意的表

Number one Sheldon

-第一条 -谢尔顿

I know that you're safe there It's fine

我知道你在学校很安全没事的

That's reason number four Please don't skip ahead

那是第四个理由你不要随便跳过

Honey

宝贝

I trust you Just go to bed at a reasonable hour

我信任你你晚上别太晚睡就行啦

and call if you need anything

如果有事情就打电话回家

Otherwise I'll see you tomorrow

没其他事的话明天回家见

Okay Number one I'm not

好理由一我不是...

Goodbye Sheldon

再见啦谢尔顿

Who hangs up on a list

什么人会列表没听完就挂啊

What's his problem now

他又咋啦

Nothing He wants to spend the night at the dorm

没什么他今晚想在宿舍留宿

so he can get to an early class

方便明天上早课

Really And you said okay

真的假的然后你答应啦

He is old enough to have an overnighter and

他已经到了可以自己在外过夜的年纪了而且...

it might be nice for us to have a little alone time

我们能享有一点独自在家的时间不好吗

Ooh What about Missy

懂了那米希呢

She's having dinner with a friend

她今晚跟朋友出去吃饭

So the house to ourselves

所以家里就只有我们俩人

I like it

我喜欢

Hold on

你等一下

Hello Number two

-您好 -第二条...

I have my own bathroom Number

我有自己的卫浴第...

Boy that's a lot of plates

天啊也端太多菜了

What do you want Georgie I just talked to Meemaw

-小乔治你找我干嘛 -我刚跟姥姥说过话

She says she's gonna be out of town for a couple days

她说她要去外地几天

Yup she told me

是啊她有跟我说

Patty melt Good choice

美乃滋肉饼三明治有眼光

Okay Enjoy

上完啦大家慢用

I'm just worried about you being all by yourself

我只是不放心你一个人孤零零

in that big house I'll be fine

-在那个大房子里 -我没事

What if there's a tornado

万一来龙卷风了呢

Did Meemaw ever show you where her hidey hole is

姥姥有带你看过家里的避风洞吗

Georgie I'm really busy right now Sorry

- 小乔治我现在真的没空 - 抱歉

I'll swing by Meemaw's later maybe bring some takeout

我晚点再去姥姥家找你顺便带点外卖过去

Don't bother They send me home with plenty of food

不必了店里每次都给我打包一堆

Great Score me a patty melt would you

太好啦帮我弄一份美乃滋肉饼三明治吧

I won't I'm gonna go now

-你做梦 -我不打扰你啦

What are you doing Kissing our baby

-你干嘛呢 -亲我们的宝宝啊

You want one too

你也想要一个啵啵吗

不要

Bye bye

拜拜

I'm home

我回来啦

Anybody here

家里有人吗

Missy Yeah

-米希吗 -对

You're home early

你回来早啦

It's 7 00

都七点了好吗

Are you sleeping

你在睡觉吗

Yeah

是啊

Where's Dad

爸爸呢

I'm here

我也在

We were both just real tired

我们今天太困了

Please stop talking

拜托别再继续讲话了

What on earth is going on

到底是在搞什么鬼

Aah No skateboarding in the hallway

走廊不允许溜滑板

This childishness cannot be allowed to continue

这种幼稚行径不应该继续下去

Hello I need to tattle

打扰了我想来告状

What

怎么

Is your room on fire

你房间失火了吗

没有啊

But I see smoke

但我看到里面在冒烟啊

Okay

好吧

You need to know there's people skateboarding

我想通报有人在走廊溜滑板

and playing loud music in the hallways

还有人在放超大声的音乐

What do you want me to do about it

那你希望我做什么呢

You're the resident advisor

你是宿舍的宿管

It's your job to enforce the rules

你得负责让别人守规矩啊

I'll get right on it

我马上就去办

Thank you

谢谢

The system works

监管系统一切正常

Oh I'm gonna be so cranky tomorrow

我明天脾气绝对要人命

So how'd you hear about these poker machines

所以你是从哪听说有赌博机卖的呢

I know a guy

我有认识人

What kind of guy

什么样的人啊

A guy who knows a guy

一个认识其他人的人

Well what do you know about that guy

那你对那个人有什么样的了解呢

He owned a riverboat casino

他曾拥有一艘赌船

He owned

曾拥有吗

He might be dead

他有可能已经不在人世

Dead

死了吗

He might not be

也可能还没啊

They never found the body

一直都没有找到他的尸体

Oh my God

我的天啊

Exciting huh No It's upsetting

-很刺激对吧 -是很闹心

Oh now come on

不要这样好吗

You've been in the sporting goods business long enough

你在体育用品界也那么多年了

Haven't you ever sold a bunch of shoulder pads

难道你就没有过贩卖过从货车后面

that fell off the back of a truck

掉到路边的护肩吗

Absolutely not

当然没有

I buy 'em from a reputable company named Tuffy

我都是跟商誉好的品牌进货

Boring

你真无聊

I smell your shampoo

我闻到您的洗发精味了

Aw damn it

靠

How long have you been sitting out there

你在这里坐多久啦

All night And why

-整晚 -为什么呢

Are you familiar with Arkham Asylum from the Batmancomics

你听过蝙蝠侠漫画里的阿卡姆吗

No Well it's a madhouse

-没有 -那是一家疯人院

as is my dormitory after the sun goes down

我宿舍在太阳下山过后也是如此

Sheldon I am the president of this university

谢尔顿我是大学的校长

I don't handle noise complaints

我不处理噪音这种小事

That's why there's a resident advisor

所以我们才设置了宿管啊

Oh I went to him And

-我去找过他啊 -然后呢

You saw me sleeping on the bench like a hobo

你也看到我像流浪汉睡在椅子上了

What do you think Can't you just

-你说呢 -你就不能...

I don't know chalk this up as part of the college experience

你难道就不能... 把这当做大学经历的一部分吗

Yeah the clown college experience

如果我读的是小丑大学的话就行

I'm sorry I'm cranky

失礼了我心情很差

I've compiled a list of reasons

我写下了一串

why I should be appointed the dormitory R A

我为什么应该被指派为宿管的理由

Number one Fine You're the R A

- 理由一 -行宿管给你当

Okay "Number one I love rules

好的 "理由一我喜欢规矩

Creating them following them

无论是定规矩遵守规矩

and most fun of all enforcing them "

还是最有趣的执法"

You're the R A Sheldon

你就是宿管谢尔顿

Excellent "Number two punishment

太好了 "理由二惩罚

for rule infractions must be both fair and merciless "

不守规矩的人必须做到公平与无讲情面"

Eggs and pancakes

鸡蛋与松饼

That's what a lumberjack gets for chopping all that wood

耕了一整晚田的牛就值得吃点好的

I'll be Paul Bunyan

如果我是猛牛

you can be my babe the blue fox

你就是我耕不坏的良田

George

乔治你坏死了

Ugh Still

还在腻腻歪歪呢

Morning honey

早安啊宝贝

What is happening with you two

你们两个这是怎么了

What do you mean

你这问题是什么意思

Is one of you dying

你们有人生病要去世了吗

No one's dying

没有人要过世

Sometimes married people kiss

有时候已婚夫妇也是可以亲亲的啊

On TV maybe not here

电视上有戏我们家没门

Well young lady how do you think you came into this world

小姑娘你觉得你是怎么诞生到这世上的呢

Okay you're freaking me out

够了我要被恶心死了

Here you go as advertised

都在这里啦童叟无欺

All right Those look good

好的货看起来很不错啊

Wait Hold on How do we know they work

不用着急我们怎么知道都还好用呢

What kind of operation you think I'm running here

你觉得我是哪种商人啊

Well I don't know The word "sketchy" comes to mind

不知道啊比如"不良"之类的

Be cool

好好说话

Uh you mind if we plug a couple in

不介意我们插上电试几台吧

Mind if you show me the money

不介意先让我看看钱吧

Sure Turn around

没问题头转过去

Why

为什么

You want the money or not

你还想不想要钱了

Okay go ahead

好了你赶紧

Okay

好了

20 grand

两万

Light 'em up

插电让我看看

That's the sexiest thing I've ever seen in my life

这是我这辈子见过最性感的画面了

Really

真的吗

Well I just took my pants off

可我才刚脱裤子秀大雕欸

Attention residents of Bower Hall

鲍尔宿舍的各位住宿生请注意

My name is Sheldon Cooper and I'm your new R A

我叫谢尔顿·库珀是你们的新宿管

The age of chaos is over

动乱时代结束了

I repeat the age of chaos is over

我再说一遍动乱时代结束了

Please take a moment

请你们花些时间

to familiarize yourself with the dormitory rules

熟悉下贴在布告栏的

posted on the bulletin board

宿舍规矩

Ignorance of these rules is no excuse and violators will be

没有任何借口能无视这些规矩违反者将被...

New rule Unauthorized use of my bullhorn is forbidden

新规矩不准擅自使用我的扩音器

I repeat Unauthorized Shut up

-我再说一遍... -你丫闭嘴

Anybody home

有人在家吗

Oh good You're here

太好了你在家啊

Hey

你好

Check it out I got this video about childbirth

你看我租了介绍分娩的影片

I thought we could watch it tonight

我们今晚可以一起看

That sounds awful

听起来也太可怕了

Well it does say "Contains graphic images"

外盒上的确写着

right there on the box

"含有血腥画面"

Maybe some other time Georgie

改天再看吧小乔治

No worries I also picked up Look Who's Talking

没事我还租了《飞跃童真》

which is just about a baby who says stuff

主角是个会说话的宝宝内容很温和

If you're trying to make this like a date night

如果你是想把今晚营造成约会

or something it's not happening

那你想多了

Oh who said anything about a date

谁说要约会了

It's just us having dinner and watching a movie

不过是你我二人共进晚餐后再看部电影

Last time we did that I wound up pregnant

我们上次做完这套流程后我就怀孕了

Mm that was a good date

那次约会太爽了

Well that's not happening tonight

你今晚绝不会有机会"爽"

I get it Nothing romantic

我懂不涉及情爱嘛

Just two future parents watching the miracle of childbirth

就是两个准父母一起看分娩的奇迹

or a movie that got two thumbs up from Siskel and Ebert

或是一部影评家西斯科和伊伯特赞不绝口的电影

And not only that

不只这样

Then someone defaced my rule sheet

接着还有人在我的规矩表上

with a drawing of testicles

乱涂乱画睾丸

Well that is so immature

这举动太幼稚了

I agree Simply naming me dorm R A isn't enough to command respect

我同意光任命我为宿管不足以博得众人的尊重

I need a physical symbol of my authority

我需要一个实物来象征我的权威

like the way a king had a scepter

就像国王的节杖一样

So you want a scepter

所以你想要一把节杖

No that could be used against me

不行那反而会被用来对付我

Ooh how about a badge

要不弄个徽章怎么样

I'd be like a Texas Ranger

我会像德州骑警一样

who patrols the halls of a dormitory

巡视宿舍走廊

Well these all just such terrific ideas but

这些主意都很棒

um how about an official letter from my desk

不过你看由我办公室发布一封亲笔信

with a handwritten note attesting to your position

来证明你的地位怎么样

All right "To the students of Bower Hall "

来 "致鲍尔宿舍的全体学生"

That's your handwriting

你的字迹就这水平啊

"This document

"本公文

bestows on Sheldon Cooper all the powers

赋予谢尔顿·库珀

and privileges of resident advisor "

宿管的一切权力与特权"

"Bestows " I like it

"赋予" 我喜欢这词

Sloppy but I like it

字有点潦草但我喜欢

I can see a new horizon

我能看见新天地

Realize

意识到

That will keep me realizin'

那让我一直意识到

Biggest part of me Ambrosia

You're the biggest part of me

你是我生命中最重要的人

Nope

没眼看

Need your lovin' here beside

请陪在我身边一直爱我...

Well I got to tell you

不得不说

that was pretty exciting Mm I told you

-刚才好刺激 -我早跟你说了

For a while there I felt like Bonnie and Clyde

有一瞬间我觉得我们是雌雄大盗

without all the murder and mayhem

只是少了那些谋杀和骚乱

Well the night's still young

夜尚未央说不好哦

So at the risk of sounding more like Bonnie than Clyde uh

接下来这句可能更像是雌大盗会问的问题

where do we stand in our relationship

我们现在算什么关系

You're the one who broke up with me

是你甩了我记得吗

Oh maybe I've rethought the situation

可能我重新思考过现状

So you were wrong

这么说你当初做错了

I don't believe there's any right or wrong here

这事不存在什么对或错吧

Say it Say you were wrong

说出来说你做错了

I do regret it

我确实后悔了

Because you were

因为...你...

wrong

做错了

Yes

没错

So what do you say you want to give it another chance

你意下如何想再给彼此一次机会吗

Hang on

等一下

Just give me a straight answer

能不能给我一句痛快话

I'm a big boy I can take it

我是大人了我能扛得住

I think we're being followed

我们好像被跟踪了

What

什么

不会吧

The pickup truck

那辆皮卡吗

The orange Pinto

是那辆橙色福特斑马

I saw it when we gassed up

我在加油时看见过它

It's been two cars back ever since

之后它一直隔着一辆车跟着我们

I'm gonna speed up and see what happens

我准备加速看看会怎么样

We're being followed

我们被跟踪了

Are you still excited

你还兴奋吗

No I'm upset

不我闹心死了

Good

很好

Then we're on the same page

那我们就达成共识了

Open up It's the R A

开门我是宿管

Yeah

干嘛

It's quiet hours You have to turn the music off

现在不得喧哗你得把音乐关掉

Says who Me the R A

-谁说的 -本宿管说的

You probably didn't hear me over the music

你刚才可能因为音乐太响没听见我说话

Maybe this will convince you

也许这能使你信服

Her cursive is maybe questionable

她的手写体可能值得怀疑

but trust me my authority is not

但相信我我的权威绝对不容质疑

Joke's on you I have Scotch tape

闹笑话的是你我有透明胶带

I don't see him anywhere Do you

我没看见他的踪影你呢

Nope Oh man

-没看见 -老天

Well now that that's over

现在这一切结束了

I'm starting to feel the excitement again

我又开始觉得兴奋了

Crazy right I think that's the way danger works

很疯狂对吧我想危险就是会带来刺激感

Oh it's like a rollercoaster

就像坐过山车

Well

二位

ain't this a coincidence

太巧了吧

Oh come on

不是吧

What's up Mom and Dad are being weird

-什么事 -爸爸妈妈很古怪

Can I hang out here

我能待在你这吗

Actually ain't a good time

其实现在不太方便

Come on in Missy

快进来米希

Dang it

美梦破灭了

Sucker

奶嘴

Good

很好

Ooh Look Who's Talking

是《飞跃童真》啊

Classic Hey did you know

-经典之作 -你知不知道

the baby is the guy from Die Hard

给宝宝配音的就是《虎胆龙威》的布鲁斯·威利斯

No Yeah

-不知道 -是真的

He can do everything

他无所不能

I was sitting there

我刚才坐在那

Yeah well now you're not

现在你得坐别处了

I'm being nothing but nice here

我对你无微不至

I don't know why you got to give me a hard time

我不明白你为什么非要跟我过不去

Why I'll tell you why

为什么我告诉你为什么

You ruined my life Is that enough "why" for you

你毁了我的人生这理由够了吗

Hey you weren't so innocent

别说得你好像多无辜一样

If I recall you provided alcohol to a minor me

我没记错的话你给未成年人也就是我喝酒

That's illegal

这是犯法的

You lied about your age You lied first

-你隐瞒了真实年龄 -你先隐瞒的

Okay you know what Let's not do this in front of your sister

我们还是别在你妹妹面前吵了

It actually feels normal Keep going

我倒觉得这熟悉的场景让我安心你们继续吵

And let's not forget I only lied 'cause you're hot

别忘了我说谎是因为你很辣

Oh my God

救命啊

We don't need to watch a movie about a talking baby

我们不用看主角宝宝会说话的电影了

You're right here

眼前就有一个逼逼不停的巨婴

Ooh lock the door lock the door

别忘了锁门快点

No one's home Just in case

-又没人在家 -以防万一嘛

I have a wild and crazy idea

我想玩点狂野的

I like where this is headed

我喜欢这个开头

Let's make a baby

我们来造人吧

You're kidding right

你是在开玩笑吧

I don't know It might be fun to start over

我说不好从头来过可能会很好玩啊

Fun What house you been living in

好玩这屋子里发生过的鸡飞狗跳你都忘了吗

I'm serious We've been getting along so great

我是认真的我们最近水乳交融

and I have all this extra time on my hands

我又有那么多空闲时间

Uh let's take advantage

不如就好好利用吧

Your son's about to have a baby You can take care of that one

你儿子马上要有宝宝了你照顾那个就行

No my mother called dibs

不行我妈抢先预订了照顾权

Your mother's a million years old

你妈都有一万岁老了

You think she's gonna be changing diapers

你觉得她能半夜爬起来

in the middle of the night

换尿片吗

I'll tell you what your problem is

我来告诉你你哪根筋不对

you got kicked out of your church

你被踢出教会

your your kids are grown up

孩子也长大了

you're feeling sorry for yourself and

你自怨自艾

yeah you think a baby'll solve the problem

觉得一个宝宝就能解决这些问题

Well Say something

怎么样说话啊

You make me so mad

你让我超级火大

Where you going

你去哪

We can still do it mad

我们还是可以一炮泯恩仇啊

So what do you want uh

你想吃点什么那个...

Dennis Right

-丹尼斯 -对对

Dennis Tough name

丹尼斯这名字很彪悍

So what do you want Dennis

你想吃点什么丹尼斯

Couldn't help noticing you got Texas plates on that truck

我不禁注意到你们的卡车挂着德州车牌

Operating poker machines ain't legal in Texas

在德州开赌博机店是违法的

So what are you a cop

怎么你是条子吗

No no I'm just a guy who might call the cops you know

不是我只是可能会报警的人

if we don't come to an arrangement

如果我们不达成某种协议

Can I take your order

要点单吗

Thank you honey

谢谢亲爱的

You know I got a hankering for chicken fried steak

我好想吃炸鸡式牛排

Gravy on top but only if it's cream gravy

表面淋上肉汁但必须得是奶油肉汁哦

And the mashed potatoes with more cream and gravy on top

来份土豆泥淋上更多的奶油和肉汁

And uh ice tea when you can

再来杯冰茶

No gravy on that

这就不用淋肉汁了

And how about for you two

你们二位呢

I'm gonna use your restroom

我需要借用下洗手间

He knows what I like

他知道我喜欢吃什么

You're leaving Uh huh

-你要走了 -是啊

I got to tinkle

我要尿尿

I guess I'll have the waffles

我点一份华夫饼吧

and the lady will have um

给那位女士来份...

also waffles

也来份华夫饼吧

So what do you think

刚才的事你怎么说

Well Dennis I'm not the guy to talk to

丹尼斯这轮不到我做主

Uh why don't we wait for the boss to finish tinkling

不如等老大尿完再说吧

But I do got to tell you this is my first shakedown

但我得告诉你这是我第一次遭人勒索

Don't think of it like that

别这么想

It's just a business arrangement

这只是生意交易

Well I've been a businessman for 38 years

我做生意38年了

and I don't think I've ever been threatened before

以前从来没被人威胁过

What kind of business you in

你做哪一行

Hello Huh

-在听吗 -什么

What kind of business you in

你做哪一行

Groomer

美容师

Dog groomer yeah

狗狗美容师

Cats if you make me but I pretty much love the doggies

勉强也可以帮猫美容但我偏爱狗狗

You ever do birds

你给鸟做过美容吗

No Mm hmm Birds got feathers

没有鸟有羽毛

and they're they're self grooming pretty much

基本上自己就能梳理好

Yeah I always thought cats were self grooming

我一直以为猫猫会帮自己梳理毛

Well people think that but no No you got to

很多人有这种误解

You got to dip a cat once in a while

其实偶尔还是要帮猫咪洗澡

Well okay then

好了

Where are you going

你要去哪

Dennis I am really sorry about this

丹尼斯我对这事感到很抱歉

May I help you

请问有什么事

There's no hot water

没热水了

There is for rule followers

遵守舍规的人才有热水

You can't just turn off the hot water

你不能擅自把热水关掉

Yeah Yeah

-就是啊 -你没权这么做

If you want the benefits of civilization

如果你们想享有文明社会的待遇

you have to behave in a civilized manner

就必须做个文明人

The decision is yours

你们自己决定

I don't need a pen and paper to take names

我不需要纸笔也能记住捣乱者的名字

You What's your name

你你叫什么

You know I'll find out and there will be consequences

我会查出来的到时后果很严重

Hey what are you

你干什...