爱，死亡和机器人-S02E01-自动化客服_爱,死亡和机器人

内容

Hi.

你好

What's up with you

你怎么了

You need some energetic healing buddy.

你需要些能量治疗了朋友

Thanks for calling Vacuubot

感谢致电吸尘机器人公司

purveyors of America's finest automated vacuum cleaners.

全美最好的自动吸尘器供应商

For English press one.

英语服务请按1

You've asked to speak to a human representative.

您已要求转接人工服务

The current wait time is six hours and 14 minutes.

目前需等待6小时14分钟

Seriously

逗我呢

If you have a repair query press one. If you need...

维修需求请按1 如果您需要...

Alrighty then

好的

have you tried turning your Vacuubot off and on again

您是否尝试过重启您的机器人

There you are.

你在这啊

Our onboard GOLDEN YEARS system

根据机载的"金色年华"系统反馈

tells us you've somehow activated Purge Mode.

您无意间启动了清除模式

This feature is designed to eradicate small pests

此功能旨在消灭小型有害动物

such as insects spiders and mice. The hell

-如昆虫蜘蛛和老鼠 -什么玩意儿

But in certain situations

但在某些情况下

larger prey like pets and some humans What

-较大的生物如宠物和人类 -什么

Could be targeted. We're sorry for any inconvenience.

也可能成为目标给您造成不便我们深感抱歉

If your Vacuubot has decided to purge all living things press three.

如果机器人决定清除屋内所有生物请按3

To end Purge Mode you will need to access the options menu.

关闭清除模式您需要进入选项菜单

To do that you will need to distract Vacuubot to get close.

为此您得分散它的注意力以便靠近

We suggest throwing something at it like a blanket or pet.

建议您向它扔东西如毯子或宠物

What in the Bodhisattva is going on here Are you fucking kidding me

这到底什么鬼你他妈在开玩笑吗

The automated system has detected high levels of profanity.

自动系统检测到了大量的脏话

Your bad attitude has been filed in our customer database.

您的恶劣态度已被记录在客户数据库中

No.

不

Now then have you calmed your sassy boots down

现在您是否已冷静下来了

If so press one.

如果是请按1

That's better.

好多了

So are you willing to throw your pet at the Vacuubot

那么您是否愿意向机器人扔出宠物

Press one for yes two for no.

是请按1 否请按2

What do you mean "no"

您不愿意是什么意思

It could come down to you or it and believe this

它有可能攻击您或宠物您要知道

any pet would sacrifice you in an instant.

换作任何宠物都会毫不犹豫地牺牲您

Look into their cold animal eyes and tell me they wouldn't.

看看它们冷酷无情的眼睛反驳我吧

Come on press "yes."

好啦快按"是"

Fine throw whatever you've got over the Vacuubot

好吧那随便向机器人扔点什么

and while it struggles to be free zip in close and turn it off.

趁它忙于挣脱时冲过去关掉它

When you attacked your Vacuubot

当您攻击了您的机器人

you activated its HOME GUARD security mode "Attacked"

-便启动了它的家庭安防模式 -"攻击"

And it's identified you as a trespasser. You told me to.

-它会将您视为入侵者 -你叫我这么做的

Vacuubot will classify any area it's cleaned as its personal territory.

机器人会将清扫过的区域归为私人领地

Has this Vacuubot cleaned your entire home

这个机器人是否清扫过您整个家

Help

救命

Hey help Well it's Vacuubot's house now.

-救命 -那现在这是它的家了

We suggest you run.

建议您尽快离开

Have you left yet

您是否已离开

When you've reached minimum safe distance... Shut up.

-当您与机器人的领地... -闭嘴

from Vacuubot's territory press one.

已达到最小安全距离请按1

Fluff and fold motherfucker

慢慢收拾去吧混蛋

Damn it.

妈的

Step aside ladies.

靠边站女士们

Congratulations

恭喜

you've stopped the unstoppable killing machine that is Vacuubot.

您阻止了不可阻挡的杀戮机器吸尘机器人

Unfortunately you can't stay here though. The Vacuubot has forwarded

遗憾的是您不能待在这了机器人已将

all recorded information about you to every Vacuubot model in operation

您所有在库信息发给了每个运行中的机器人

all of whom will now hunt you ceaselessly

它们现在将不停地追杀您

until your DNA has been cleansed from the surface of the planet.

直到您从星球上彻底消失

This is your life now to hide and wander.

您今后的生活只剩下躲藏和逃亡

Never a moment's rest in this barren wasteland

在这贫瘠的荒原上颠沛流离

that is now your existence.

就是您现在的处境

Unless you'd like to purchase a place on the exclusive Vacuubot

除非您愿意购买独家的吸尘机器人

termination whitelist. Go to hell.

-终止白名单名额 -去死吧

For a special introductory rate press one.

如需优惠先期利率请按1